Man furious when girlfriend's coworker isn't attracted to him: 'Look at me, how could she not find me attractive?"

Tracey Folly

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events I experienced firsthand; used with permission.

I fell in love with a coworker. By the way, never fall in love with a coworker. It's bad news. I ought to know; I've done it more than once.

We began dating, and I told a few of my coworker/friends about our budding romance before my new beau instructed me to keep it secret. I swore my friends to secrecy, which only had about a fifty percent success rate. It was the best I could do since I'd already let the proverbial cat out of the bag.

Obviously, it bothered me that he didn't want our relationship to be public. It was a large office of perhaps 100 people in our department alone. There were plenty of other workplace romances going around. Adding one more to the mix wouldn't have made much difference.

It wasn't even against the rules.

He assured me he just didn't think it was appropriate for everyone to know our personal business. It wasn't like he was ashamed of me or anything. "I just want to keep it private," he said.

Eighteen months into our relationship, he was fired. A day after he was fired, one of my coworkers approached me to tell me he was emailing one of my other coworkers.

I didn't believe her. So I asked for proof.

She forwarded me the emails, which included my boyfriend asking the other woman to phone him on his private number. There was no way she could have faked the message and gotten the number right if she didn't have his number in the first place. As luck would have it, he didn't deny it anyhow.

Here's where things took a strange turn. When I asked him why he had reached out to her, he told me it was because I'd told him she had a crush on another coworker... and he wanted to know why she didn't have a crush on him instead.

My boyfriend was distraught that she found another man attractive when he had been sitting right under her nose the entire time. Literally, she sat directly behind him in a low-walled cubicle for the last eighteen months, so she couldn't have been unaware of how good-looking he was.

That was his sentiment. Not mine. I was horrified by the whole thing.

"Why do you care that she finds another man attractive?" I questioned. "What's it to you? You have a girlfriend."

"I know," he replied. "It just doesn't make any sense. Look at him, and then look at me, how could she not find me attractive?" He carried on for much longer than I care to admit.

He was so upset that my coworker, who used to be his coworker, too, wasn't attracted to him that he talked about it for several years.

Unfortunately, we dated for a long time after that incident; fortunately, we aren't together now.

What do you think? Comments are welcome.

Why would you want to Buy Me a Coffee? I am a full-time writer and a full-time unpaid caregiver to my 82-year-old father, who lives with Parkinson's. Your tip or donation allows me to provide for his care and comfort around the clock while working from home. Thank you.

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Ordained Minister, Universal Life Church

Massachusetts State

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