*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events I experienced firsthand; used with permission.
I have a bad habit. I like to watch television while I eat, or do I like to eat while I watch television? Either way, it's a problem. Watching Dr. Pimple Popper ruins my appetite.
In case you missed it, there is a show on television called Dr. Pimple Popper that might be the grossest television show in history. The people on the show all have the most interesting stories to tell and the most horrifying skin conditions to endure.
There are a lot of cystomas and lipomas and other things that need popping and/or otherwise removing. The doctor removes all kinds of things growing on people that shouldn't be there. Sometimes it gets unsettling, and I have to cover my eyes not to see the procedure. Some other people in my family watch that part, but I don't.
The worst part of the show, especially after I've closed my eyes, is when the doctor compares everything to the foods that I eat. I've never felt so personally attacked.
"Oh, look," the doctor will say. "Do you like chicken cutlets?" Then she talks about chicken cutlets until I think I will never eat chicken cutlets again. "How about cottage cheese?"
I curse myself for turning on the television and not changing the channel whenever I see that Dr. Pimple Popper is playing, but it's also too good to miss. So there lies the dilemma.
But why does she have to target all the things I like to eat? I wish she would name these things in medical terms and be done with it.
Viewers like me could still get an eyeful of everything without giving them food names. Then again, I don't have to watch the show again, but I probably will.