*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events I experienced firsthand; used with permission.
My longest relationship lasted twelve years. I do not know how it lasted that long. My boyfriend of more than a decade was the most selfish man I've ever met.
I paid his rent, bought his groceries, and took him clothes shopping. I even gave him rides until the day I bought him a car, and after I gave him that car, I paid for his insurance, gas, oil changes, and auto repairs.
And he couldn't even buy me a Yoo-hoo.
We frequently shopped at a local warehouse store. This store had several vending machines near the exit door, and one of those vending machines sold ice-cold cans of Yoo-hoo. I've loved that chocolate drink since childhood, and that store was the only place where I've ever seen cans of the beverage sold from a vending machine.
Unfortunately, I always forgot about the Yoo-hoo vending machine until after we exited the store when my boyfriend would invariably pull a can of Yoo-hoo out of his pocket, crack it open, and announce, "I know you love Yoo-hoo so I didn't get you one."
Then he would proceed to drink the entire can without letting me have a single sip. He didn't believe in sharing, especially not with me.
I didn't laugh, but I let it go. However, when he continued doing it time after time, I grew angry.
Now, I have to admit I was old enough to remember to buy my own Yoo-hoo as we exited the store. So I understand I failed to take much personal responsibility if I allowed the same scenario to play out a dozen times, but that's really not the point here.
The point is that the man I dated for over a decade consistently bought himself my favorite chocolate drink, and then announced that he had not bought one for me on purpose despite knowing how much I loved them. He would buy himself the Yoo-hoo while I was busy paying the cashier for his items. So I hardly think it was too much to ask for him to buy me one, too.
To add insult to injury, he didn't have a job. The money he used to buy himself a Yoo-hoo while purposefully and maliciously excluding me came either from the allowance I gave him or the quarters I kept in the ashtray of my car that he always emptied into his pockets without permission.
This wasn't an isolated incident either. On over one occasion, he came to my house, pulled two packages of orange Tic Tac mints out of his pocket, and said, "I know how much you love orange Tic Tacs so I bought myself two packs of them, and I bought you none."
My mother was fond of him, but she knew I spent my entire paycheck on him while he acted entitled and selfish in return. She once begged him to go to the dollar store and pick up five dollars worth of "presents" to give me to show his appreciation, but he refused.
He was without a doubt the most selfish person I've ever met, and I still feel angry every time I think about those ice-cold Yoo-hoos.