Women and men live on different planets that are barely in the same galaxy.
Women don’t understand the men’s planet, often called Mars, and Men haven’t the faintest idea of what goes among the sisters of Venus.
Most guys wake up to silent treatment one morning without knowing what they did to change the house bedroom dynamics. Most men also understand what the term dog house, and most fall victim to her the C word.
Don’t. Ever. Call. Her. Crazy.
Women don’t forget. She’ll pull an incident from 2008 as an argument for a discussion in 2025 and beat you to the pulp with it. Don’t underestimate the memory of an angry wife.
Here’s what you’ve been unknowingly doing wrong.
1. She absolutely hates it when you sneeze loudly.
Farting and burping can be all the rage in a comfortable relationship. But sneezing above 50 decibels will make her want to shoot you at point-blank range with a shotgun. The rate of divorces may go down if men could hold a few sneezes.
“Don’t achoo at me, boy.”
2. She needs no explanations or solutions.
The best thing you can do when she comes with a problem asks: Are we listening or solving? The question will change your relationship for the better.
3. Late! You. Are. Late. Mister.
She doesn’t want to be a second or third thing on your priority list. I’m a notorious lateard, and chronically miscalculate ETAs for social gatherings.
She hates it.
4. Hygene and smelly armpits.
Most women think men are pigs. I’m not sure if that’s sexist, but she’ll notice your smell from the drive-in, and if you missed your shower, don’t expect her to get all frisky.
If she tells you to brush your teeth or clean yourself, that means you’re hitting a nerve for a while, and she can’t take it anymore.
5. When you’re not mentally present.
The scrolling man may soon become a synonym for ‘loser.’ Women hate it when you don’t give them attention, especially when it’s only two of your somewhere. She especially hates it when you ditch her for an aimless stroll down your Instagram feed.
6. Talking about your ex and previous partners.
Even if she asked, she doesn’t really want to learn about the bombastic sex life you had with another woman. Tabooing the ex is common sense, but it’s worth freshening up the memory from time to time.
7. When men don’t pick up on obvious social cues
Men can be awkward social creatures, and women can sometimes hit a brick wall. She may set the mood for a wild night between the two, and you may just randomly change clothes and fire your PlayStation. Jimmy Fallon famously blew his chance with Nikole Kidman to play video games.
Poor Jimmy found about the obvious signals Nicole sent only years later on live TV.
8. Obsession with her looks and life.
Women crave your attention, but nobody wants to date a potential serial killer. Staying too focused on her appeal may make her feel uncomfortable and unsafe.
9. She is not a fan of your work when you bring it home.
The pandemic is not helping husbands around the country to keep the work at work. Many have to work from the bedroom, living room, and other spaces that are usually work-free. Women that leave their work at work may find your lack of organization annoying the least.
10. She despises when men boast about accomplishments
Women secretly hate when you’re bragging about your success in front of your friends. Your partner is not cool with it, and she thinks you should definitely stop that right now.
11. No ambition, no goals, and zero personal investment.
Women don’t like losers. Most girls tend to date upward and are more ken to staying socially mobile. If you don’t plan to improve and work hard to make a better life, she may find someone who does.
Men can count 11 things that they dislike about women too.
Nobody is perfect, and we are all unique. You may have different problems in a relationship than the next guy, but at least one gender difference eventually finds its way into your daily conversations.