My Dream Was Shattered Into A Thousand Pieces… And?

Tim Denning

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I’ve been writing a lot about my big career change. Well, last week it got shattered into a thousand pieces. I burned the boats and went after one opportunity and it all turned to sh*t.

I felt like crap afterwards. One of my friends said I looked like I’d been hit in the face with a bowling ball and they were probably right.

I got back from Sydney feeling pretty sorry for myself. Who was I to believe that I could change the world and land a moon-shot? Obviously, I did.

This post is not about being down or feeling sorry for myself: In fact, it’s the complete opposite. Like me, you’ve had your dream shattered into a thousand pieces too. Congratulations! Join the club.

Even Mr. Self Help freaking guru himself Tim Denning doesn’t always win.

Nobody does. That’s what nobody is talking about.

“Most of us are losing more times than we’re winning”

Anyone that has done anything meaningful and believes in personal development knows that most of the days and weeks are spent losing and recovering from the multiple punches to the face we’re going to get regularly.

Many of you email me thinking I have all the answers — I don’t. The truth is I’m not winning most of the time. It’s the 1% of times that I win that you think is my daily life. Reality is never what you read on a blog or see on Instagram. I can’t sell you that dream, sorry.

When you dream big, this happens.

I’m obsessed with telling you all to dream big because when you aim for Saturn and you land on the Moon instead (freaking cliche Tim!) you’re still way further ahead than you ever dreamed you could get to.

Unfortunately, dreaming big increases the chances of your dream being shattered into tiny little pieces where you feel like sh*t. If you don’t like this reality, then you can settle for mediocrity, but that will lead to regrets.

Regrets force you to die inside and then you become a lifeless zombie that starts to chase money because that’s what all the other guys and girls are doing while they run on the hamster wheel of life.

Screw that.

I’d rather all of us dream the hell out of everything and fail than never try.

The feeling doesn’t last.

So, like me, your dream died in the ass too did it? I’ve got the best news I could ever possibly deliver to you: it doesn’t last.

Give it two days (if you trained yourself for this event) or a few weeks if you’re out of practice, and everything will return to normal. Your inner world won’t collapse. You won’t want to lash out and run your mouth off.

All feelings don’t last forever.

Let me give you some advice that helped me last week. That advice is this: get back in the saddle as quickly as possible. The moment my dream was shattered, I just started taking action on the next dream.

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Everything happens for a reason.

Even though my dream was shattered I know it’s not the end. Often, timing is what messes everything up. The people I was dealing with last week will be friends for life. We will do something together at some point, just maybe not right now.

In the short-term, this may look horribly frustrating (especially for an impatient blogger like me). Thankfully, with some experience under my belt, I know it will all work out.

Believing everything happens for a reason will help take you out of the mindset that destroys your next dream. We sabotage our future dreams because we fall into self-pity and feeling sorry for ourselves.

I’m convinced the next dream will be bigger, badder and cooler than the one I just lost out on. That’s the belief I want you to adopt.

“If you won’t back yourself then nobody else will. You don’t need a reason”

You didn’t get what you wanted. And?

That’s right. My question for you is AND?

You are in control of the meaning of everything that happens to you. Do you think we all get 100% of what we want or deserve? God no…

“My answer is AND? because nobody cares that you didn’t get what you want sweetheart”

Most of us don’t get what we want when we want it. That’s life. The sooner you can come to this realization the sooner you can move on.

Moving on is the superhuman trait.

What impresses me the most is people whose dreams are shattered and can move on quickly. I never used to be that guy until recently. I’ll be honest; I copied other people who did the same thing.

Moving on leads to execution and that’s what will fuel your future dreams.

Moving on quickly takes discipline, guts and courage and this is what I want you to aim for. It’s the fastest way to get back on track and avoid the tidal wave of emotions that could ruin your life, career and relationships.

Stand up straight and get back into motion again.

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What’s your next idea? What would this look like if it wasn’t failure? What would this look like if it were simple?

These are the questions that will move you forward and that’s what I want for you. I want you to crush the next dream rather than crying and trying to pick up the pieces of this shattered dream.

I always try to lead through my own example. You can do the same. If nothing else, move on so that you can inspire others to do the same through your actions.

That’s as better reason as any. No one respect or follows a sook. We follow leaders who show us how to be bigger than ourselves.

Finally: downtime.

I’m also not Superman so if what I just said makes you think I am, I’m sorry. A bit of downtime after you have your dreams shattered is also not a bad idea. Take some time out. You can’t always be ‘ON’ 24/7 like the motivational quotes tell you that you can.

We all need to recharge.

That’s what I am going to do right now. Your dreams are going to be shattered at some point. That’s a guarantee. The only question I want you to ponder is AND?

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Aussie Blogger with 100M+ views — Writer for CNBC & Business Insider. Inspiring the world through Personal Development and Entrepreneurship www.timdenning.com

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