What should you do when going through a divorce

Shelley Wenger

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Going through a divorce can be very challenging. Your whole life is going to have to change, whether that is good or bad (or everything in between). However, this process can often take a few months (or even years), which means living in limbo during that time.

A lot can change during the process, and there are certain things that you should and shouldn’t do until you are a single person.

Here are some things that you should do.

Have people that you trust on your side. You should never go through this process alone. You are going to need to lean on your family and friends, so you don’t want to push them away!

That being said, you don’t need to let them know EVERY detail that is going on. You are just going to want someone that you can talk to when you feel like you need to vent.

You also need an experienced lawyer on your side. Though you may not want to hire a lawyer, it is a bad idea not to. You are going to want someone who is willing to fight for you (and not get too emotional during this time).

You need to continue to live your life. Though it may feel like your world is ending, you can’t completely stop living your life. Continue going to work and spending time with your family and friends. Do the things that you would do if you weren’t getting divorced, like going out to eat and spending time playing games and enjoying your favorite hobbies.

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Find a way to let go. Divorce can be devastating for many, and you need to find a way to let go — of the guilt, feeling of failure, and any other feelings that you may have. Many good marriages fall apart, and yours was no different. You tried and tried, and probably tried some more. There was nothing more that you can do, so you need to find a way to move on.

Don’t overdo it when it comes to spending. Many people go on a shopping spree during their divorce as they start their new lives over. They may need to find a new home, which will need to be decorated. They may just go shopping to help them feel better.

However, your expenses are going to be changing in the following months, and you don’t want to start your new life unable to afford anything. In fact, you are going to learn to live on one income instead of two, while paying for two homes. Lawyer fees can also affect your financial situation. Now is the time to cut back on your expenses and save as much money as you can!

Keep your appointments. Many people get angry and can do hurtful things, like skip meetings with lawyers and hold up court due to being late. However, this doesn’t do much more than making yourself look bad. So, make sure that you are on time for every meeting with the lawyer and in the courtroom. If your ex can’t do this, it will look bad on him or her, not you!

Take care of yourself. Your health is always important, but many people let themselves go when they are going through a divorce. They don’t sleep (or they sleep too much). They don’t eat (or they overeat). They may turn to comfort food, instead of the food that is going to keep them healthy.

This can be a big mistake. Make sure that you are focused on yourself during this time. Get enough sleep and nourish your body with good food. Keep exercising and enjoying life! You deserve it.

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It can be hard to figure out what you need to do and what you shouldn’t do, while you are going through a divorce. However, you need to make sure that you have a good support system (and a good lawyer)! You also need to find a way to forgive yourself and move on. You still deserve to have a good life, no matter what happened before.

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Shelley is a small town farm mom of two boys. She is a veterinary technician, so she is proud to write about all kinds of animals and their care. She also loves to write about writing, running a business, working from home, and much more.

Glenville, PA

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