I grew up as someone who wanted everyone to get along. When my family members or friends would fight, I’d literally end up sick to my stomach. Conflict is something I still run from, but in the reality of 2020, I know I cannot escape it.
As I grow older, I realize how crucial conflict is. We need to learn from each other, call each other out, and hold one another accountable. It’s not comfortable, but it’s mandatory. It’s how we grow. This week will go down in history, and as a Canadian, I didn’t realize how much the US election would impact me. Until I started seeing my friends around the world chime in and argue with one another.
This set me back to my childhood responses. Anxiety, feeling sick, and wishing everyone could get along. Eventually, I snapped out of that and recognized the importance of dialogue, discussion, and the growth that comes when we disagree.
This willingness to let people fight it out has freed up a lot of my energy. I played the human resource representative for my family, friends, and anyone I interacted with. That’s a lot of free labor. This week has taught me that we are not all on the same page, and that’s the reality of life on Earth. If I don’t accept that, how will I move forward, creating the future I want to see?
We each have our unique experiences and perspectives, so who am I to try and mediate every conflict? We are in a time when ignorance cannot be shifted unless the person is willing to do it themselves. I was triggered by the ignorance all around me, and it left me feeling stuck. Other people’s perspectives, which I have no control over, stopped me from creating and doing my work.
Peace is not the absence of conflict but the presence of creative alternatives for responding to conflict — alternatives to passive or aggressive responses, alternatives to violence.
I believe my creations offer alternatives to conflict, but I had not realized it until reading this quote. As an astrologer, I consider myself a storyteller who weaves the picture together using astrological archetypes. From a symbolic perspective, we are in an epic saga, one that is only getting started. We are changing what it means to be human and stepping into an elevated existence. But not everyone will get on the train, and this week, I chose to stay stuck at the station by focusing on others’ opinions. Now I understand how crucial it is to know where I’m investing my attention.
We wouldn’t give our credit card numbers to just anyone, yet I give away my valuable headspace all the time. This week has taught me to call back my power and remember who I am. From this place, I am reminded of how important it is to keep showing up.
As someone who holds a lot of privilege, it’s unacceptable for me to sit back. Many people are hurting, in danger, and struggling to survive. I have no excuse to let my childhood fears stop me from moving forward. I didn’t want to publish but decided to write this article as a reminder for myself to keep creating.
I am rounding the final turn of my Saturn return, a coming of age between 28 and 30. There’s no time to waste on old hurts and insecurities. It’s the time for me to own my patterns, nurture myself through them, and amplify what matters out into the world.
The solutions will come from what we create and how we act, not what we say, or complain about. Creation is how we will find common ground.
This means we can also receive from each other’s creations. We are living in a time when there is so much valuable content waiting to be digested.
Reading is Receiving
A healthy relationship doesn’t ask us to give, give, and give some more. Instead, we thrive when finding a balance between giving and receiving. I‘ve been focused on delivering to content to my followers. But lately, I‘ve received a lot from reading on this platform.
It started a couple of weeks ago when many people were chiming in on current events. You know that feeling where everyone is talking over each other, and no one is listening? That’s how the internet has felt to me this November. It’s not an environment I want to add to, so I swapped my naturally expressive online presence to a more silent one.
I want to make it clear that I am not saying we should stay silent. I feel discourse and dialogue are critical for these times. I am talking about the shaming, attacking, and hatred that’s floating around. While everyone deserves to express themselves, it’s felt draining for me to contribute to all the noise.
These feelings led me to start reading more articles on platforms like NewsBreak, and it’s been fantastic.
Reading makes you a better writer
From Hemingway to how-to-succeed articles, everyone knows good writing is accompanied by reading. It’s like the two are best friends forever. Reading is crucial to succeeding as a writer.
A space to receive
I’ve been seeing NewsBreak as a distribution channel for my work but ignoring all it can bring to my personal life. I’ve now realized NewsBreak isn’t just a space for me to give; it’s also somewhere I can come to receive. Moving forward, I am setting aside time to read on the platform. Not only will I set goals for how often I publish, but I am also going to make a point to read a lot here.
I’m not doing this to develop my skills or understand my readers; this is just for me. The internet is full of beauty, quality, and art. Anyone who sees it solely as a writer’s platform, like I did, is missing out on all the content just waiting to be read.
I am writing this for myself. I am writing this for anyone who is feeling burnt out. It’s a reminder to keep going, keep loving, and keep creating. Mostly this is a letter to the child within me who hates seeing humanity split apart. It’s a reminder that she can’t stop the division from happening, but she can hold herself together.