The only thing standing between you and misery is your pride, and surely one day of love is better than a lifetime of pride.
You are in charge of half of your destiny. Consider carefully which half of the vote you want to cast. Only 50% of people's lives may be within their control, yet they have no idea which 50% of their lives they value. In the end, they attempt to exert control over everything in their lives, which is futile. Half-hearted life is what it's called. Do you want to live a life that is just half-hearted? Stop reading this article if you believe it because I don't.
If you want to be successful, you must put your heart and soul into it. The bottom line is that although controlling your money is necessary, sometimes it's better to delegate it to someone else. Whatever your beliefs have an impact on what you believe in.
NEVER, EVER GIVE YOUR ENTIRE SELF TO SOMETHING.
Love and relationships often end in disaster because individuals believe they are the sum of their existence. Like RUMI and Romeo, most individuals who want to love and be in relationships are sad.
They were displeased. For all of their existence, they moaned (in prose and poetry) about how they couldn't enjoy themselves until they had connections and were in love. So much to adore in the world, it's staggering.
People don't fix issues, just themselves and those they're close to doing. This causes issues to arise and worsens them in certain ways. Personal relationships amplify issues. Their food source is the prey they prey on. Love and relationships may sometimes be seen as a panacea for all of life's ills. It has an alluring quality.
There is amazing sex and a fantastic promise when I promise to cure all of your issues and fulfill all of your goals. Relationships make the claim that they will address issues, but often fail to deliver on that promise.
Because it helps you feel like you've got someone else on your side, a relationship comes closest to fixing an issue by making it less stressful. However, in my experience, even this has its limitations.
Putting too much mush into a relationship may sometimes lead to shambles. Relationships may be better understood if you split life into seven equal parts: work (including money), health (including intellect), friends (including others), self (including others), and relationships (including yourself).
Love, not a relationship, is what makes life worth living. It's also impossible to adore someone while harboring animosity for someone else. More than nine out of ten failures in romantic relationships may be attributed to unresolved grudges towards a former partner or family member.
They grit their teeth and cling to all kinds of resentment, so they can't love their present spouse for that reason either. Keep in mind that everyone has all of the same characteristics. The experience is analogous to kissing a prince while suckling on a dog poop lollipop. I can already tell a change. It just takes the taste of someone's judgment or hatred dragging itself through their existence to make it permanent.
In the end, it doesn't matter whether you find your soul mate or not since you still taste bad. As a result, using mouthwash is a wise decision. Clear your mental and emotional closet of everything that isn't serving you, and truly show up.
In my opinion, this is the key differentiator.
I believe that life is a journey, and even suffering has significance in that it may educate us and lead us in the right direction. Since everything in my suffering has a purpose, I don't try to hang on to it. I've sought assistance on occasion to complete a throwaway form, and on other occasions, I've gone through a ream of paper (400 pages) detailing the discards.
Each day, reopening my heart to love has significant significance for me. It's important to me that I don't hold grudges or have regrets in my life. Doing so enables me to get a greater understanding of myself in only six minutes than a meditator does in their whole career.
Pains and difficulties do not diminish in intensity, but they do shorten in duration. I needed three years to recover from my first heartache, but just three hours to recover from my most recent one. Yes, I'm excellent at the forms, but I work on them frequently on little tasks so that I'm confident when it comes to the bigger ones.
To summarize, from my perspective, love and life are a mixed bag.
The odds are in your favor. There's no harm in giving it a go. Only if you give it your all, will you succeed.
If you're unsure, it's best to withdraw your hand.
To be safe or self-protective or careful in love means the relationship is finished.
There isn't a middle ground.
You enter the relationship with all of your knickknacks and baggage. In any other case, you'll be the punch line of a joke.
Everything you've got is yours to the taking if it all comes to nothing.
Unconditionally love your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend.
Tips for being self-assured and pouring your heart and soul into a relationship.
If you are single, develop a pattern that works for you. If you are not single, keep your routine the same. If you are dating, you could substitute a pub night with friends for a date night.
By compromising on love, people lose their connections with one another. In a relationship, you learn to know yourself better because you are still doing the things that make you a good person.
Pay attention to the other six areas of life where you may find love as well as your partnership. It's the stress of trying to generate happiness in a relationship that leads it to fail.
Prioritize fulfillment and be satisfied before entering a relationship. Don't put the responsibility of making yourself happy on your partner. Happiness, on the other hand, is like an Ogre: it's constantly hungry and never satiated. That's not the point of partnerships. If you show up to your relationship already satisfied, then it has a better chance of lasting.
Don't spend all of your time trying to satisfy your spouse; you may be doing yourself a disservice.
Avoid wishing for or starting a search for someone who shares your core beliefs. Someone who shares your interests and finds satisfaction in the same things you do. This is such a terrible idea. That's one tough thing to swallow. Disappointed love has no flavor that mouthwash can remove.
A successful relationship isn't only about finding someone who wants what you want but also shares your values and priorities in both work and life. That is unnecessary.
Honesty Is the Best Policy
Just remember that there is only one person in the world who thinks and desires as you do, and who requires the things you need in the amounts you need. In other words, it's you. Having discovered a like-minded soul is conceivable, but if you expect them to want your desires in the same order you want them, don't bother looking for that person.
You're being tricked, seduced, and manipulated by anybody who gives you the idea they want exactly what you want, exactly in the way you want it. They're just there to make you happy, so you give in to them.
Remember: If two individuals are the same, then you don't need the other one. Wear a hard helmet if you discover someone who is an identical copy of you, someone who thinks and speaks like you, someone who walks and talks like you.
Each and every one of these connections is founded on a gulf of some kind.
It's safe to assume that if your top three considerations in each of the seven domains of life are spiritual, mental, and monetary in that order, your bottom three considerations will be the same: monetary, mental, and spiritual.
Nature operates in this manner. It's not a blunder to make this statement. The human spirit, at its core, is unrepentant. On the surface, it's possible to make someone's values subordinate. We are all very strong on an innate level.
Every person has a flip side. Recognize and concentrate on what is excellent about everyone, even if they have flaws. That's really sweet. That's the art of seduction in action. It literally translates as "to delight." Instead of criticizing the 50% of something that doesn't work; we entice each other by focusing on what does.
If you don't believe you have a healthy 50/50 mix of good and bad traits, talk to your ex, your children, or your parents. They'll give it to you with both fists if you ask for it badly enough.
Your fantasies are wonderful in the short term but will harm you and your relationship in the long run if your expectations of a partner are anything other than 50/50 positive and negative. You do your best to entice your date, but it's all an act. You could, if you wanted to, dwell on the bad or the good news in your mind. Make sure you're diligent and balanced if you want a nice place to call home.
Long-term requirements are important to most people.
Succeeding in seducing someone is a lot different from succeeding in seducing yourself. And this is why it's so difficult to maintain healthy relationships. Seduction makes you believe that the pleasure you're experiencing will continue forever.
However, when your needs and theirs grow, you'll come to feel that your wants aren't being fulfilled in some areas. The last step is a test.
What's next? What are your options now that you've married someone who has preferences that you don't? So, given that this is unavoidable, how do you handle being single while in a relationship? Do you simply satisfy your own desires in the hopes of meeting your ideal partner someday, or do you realize that by giving your partner what they want, they will in turn offer it to you?
Is it common for you to go into a relationship with vigor, only to second-guess yourself the rest of the way? Although it's natural to compare yourself to others, you must suppress the need to say things like, "my goodness, my partner has it, but in a different form, my spouse is superior, they are wonderful."
Which is worse: confusion or clarity?
As a result of Western ideology, when you are with one person (in a relationship), you want to be with the many (single)... and when you are with the many (single), you want to be with just one (in a relationship). In other words, being single while also being double looks brilliant, and being double while also single looks like nirvana.
That's the pinnacle of liberal western thinking. We yearn for what we do not now possess. Consumer society, culture, and religion are all built on the premise that we "desire what we don't have." And this creates a problem for those who are interested in the commercial realm of commerce. Are you destined to relationship unhappiness if your business success is based on desiring what you don't have?
People want to have all of their long-term goals and objectives fulfilled.
When you seduce someone, you offer them what they want, and what they want will be very different from what you desire. As a result of this, partnerships are notoriously difficult to navigate. When you're being lured, your thoughts turn to how long this getting, this pleasure, will endure.
In the end, your wants will outgrow those of others, and you'll come to feel that your needs are being neglected in some way. And last but not least, there is a test.
What are your options at this point? What are your options now that you've married someone who has preferences that you don't share? To some degree, being single while in a relationship is an unavoidable fact of life. However, instead of waiting for the day when you will find your ideal partner, why not realize that by providing your partner with what they want, they, in turn, give it to you?
Is it common for you to go into a relationship with vigor, only to question if you made the correct decision later on? Even while it's normal to feel jealous of your spouse's traits, you need to suppress this by thinking, "my goodness, my partner has that, but it's in a different form. My partner is thus better."
Which is worse: confusion or understanding?
When you're with one person (in a relationship), you want to be with many. When you're single, being double seems magnificent. When you're double, being single looks like paradise. That's because Western philosophy says we desire what we don't have.
To put it another way, that's the pinnacle of western philosophy. We yearn for what we do not now possess. Having "wanted what we haven't had" has been ingrained in our society via consumerism, culture, and religion. So, for those of us who like the commercial realm of business, this poses a problem. If being successful in business comes from desiring what you don't have, are you destined in relationships to be dissatisfied for the rest of your life?
Global capitalism, even in Maoist nations, is based on the concept of "wanting what we don't have" — consumerism. However, maybe the polar opposite is true when it comes to love and relationships at home.
When it comes to love, the Eastern philosophy of "I need nothing, I desire nothing, and thus I have everything" works well.
Clients who have been in committed relationships for a long time benefit greatly from what I have to offer them. Would you be interested in learning more about that topic? If this is the case, continue reading:
So, here's the problem with combining Eastern philosophy with Western values in marriage. Let's suppose you're a 29-year-old lady who loves her clothing, physique, career, and life, but you're seeing a short, obese, stinky guy with a hairy chest and a hairy pit who eats like a pig on heat.
Your eyes are drawn upwards from your meal to see him with spaghetti and snot streaked over the front of your shirt. But his knife and fork remain firmly lodged in the napkin as he grunts loudly. He has tomato sauce dripping down the back of his hands as he talks on the phone to his ex-girlfriend. You may see Brad Pitt a few feet to the left of him if you look closely. You slink away from the desk in ecstasy.
By the time your head wanders, you've already left the table, and your body is now perched on Brad's knee, who is delighted to see you if you see what I mean. So, you're after something you don't yet have, aren't you?
And in Western culture, that's sadness, dissatisfaction, lost interest, uncertainty, unromantic, heart closed, fight to come, gosh, I wish I wasn't trapped in this terrible relationship thinking...Yes?
Here's how to cope with desiring something you don't have in a relationship and still coming out on top: (Sabotage)
Consider that your kid is competing in a race. Your child is a poor runner and as a result, they are perpetual losers. What do you tell them when they run up to you at the conclusion of the race, tears streaming down their faces because they've lost?
In other words, even if you didn't come out on top, you may be proud of yourself for other things like being the greatest starter, going faster than before, or looking fantastic while doing your best. You manage to wring a surprising universal truth from the experience in some manner. Every contest has a winner and a loser. That's a rule of thumb, not a catchphrase.
Nothing is lacking in the natural world. You may see Mr. Piggy as superior to Brad Pitt from across the table, but nature sees both as equally deserving of your attention. Compared to your spouse, Brad Pitt doesn't have any special skills or abilities. There is just one complication: "what shape?
It's only human to evaluate your spouse in light of alternative options. It's natural to be curious and drawn to the company of beautiful individuals. There is no way to avoid it, not even if you wear one of those "Ned Kelly" helmets as some faiths require. We evaluate things against one another because life and nature are inherently competitive.
To be successful in business or sports, use these principles. If you use it in a romantic connection, you will come out on the losing end of it. Instead of being half-hearted in work and home, don't be sucked into thinking that you have to be Eastern in everything. To be successful, you must have a wide range of skills and be willing to learn new ones.
When it comes to business and sports, use the Western model of "I want what I don't have," and when it comes to relationships and health, use the Eastern model of "I want what I have."
If I can assist in any way, please schedule a consultation, a business seminar, or a coaching session with me...