What Does An Introvert Lose Out On In Their Life

Riley Blue


Image by Hean Prinsloo on Unsplash

Allow me to narrate just one incident.

It was the last day of college - the Farewell party. All the girls I knew were dressed in their finest, each looking prettier than I'd ever seen them before. They were all seated when I entered the room. No one noticed me as I walked in quietly and took a seat next to my only friend - Ridhima.

She greeted me with her brightest smile and then got back to talking to her other friends sitting next to her. I tried to listen in - they were discussing all the fun they had in these four years. About all the classes bunked and the pranks played. All the first crushes and the subsequent heartbreaks. All the group picnics and dance performances in the college fest. They were reminiscing fondly about how wonderful college had been for them, and how they'd made so many beautiful memories.

Memories they knew would last a lifetime.

Memories I was not a part of.

I sat back in the chair and looked back upon my own college experience. Everyone had been good to me, and they all liked me I knew. But I'd always been too shy to join in any group activity, Ridhima had tried her best to involve me in whatever fun they were planning, but I'd always backed out faking an excuse. It was not that I didn't want to go. I did, but I was petrified of what would happen if I had to crack an impromptu joke, or was expected to be the life of the party? She had given up on me after the first year but was sweet enough to remain a close friend. And I was thankful that at least I had someone to call my own in a crowd of classmates, who were actually strangers.

And as I looked at their smiling faces, I realized how little I knew about what they hid behind their smiles. I didn't even know if they'd remember me later on, but I knew that I would. I had loved them all, and would always think fondly about them whenever I missed college. I only wish I could let them know this.

But public speaking had never been my forte.

Just then the cultural program began, and people got engrossed in it. No one, not even Ridhima noticed the girl in the pink Sari silently crying in her chair.

Crying at the memory of all the smiles she had not been able to share. All the friends she could have made, but didn't. All the times she had sat in her room reading a book or writing yet another sad story when the rest of the girls were out enjoying their lives.

But above all, she was crying because she knew she had to change, but couldn't.

This is probably just a case of extreme shyness combined with introversion, and I assure you that the girl in the pink sari is trying her best to become more articulate.

Note that an introvert isn't afraid to talk to people, we choose not to. We don't like attention.

What you have is low confidence and a day will come for sure when you'll stop caring about what the world thinks of you and just enjoy life.

I'm an introvert and I've never been left out of anything. I'm just quiet by nature. When I need to do something I do it. Most great leaders were introverts but they did what needed to be done for progress.

One of the biggest misconceptions about introverts is that we are shy and lack confidence.

Introverts live and act the way they do out of choice, not because they are too scared of socially awkward to involve themselves in activities.

Introverts and Introversion: How different would the world be if there were no extroverts?

Here are a few of the things that might have happened :

The people who are introverts presently would not feel left out in any way. Like one might argue that after college is over, the ones who socialized the least (the actual introverts) are the first ones to be forgotten among the batch. Also since the society would more or less be "equal" then, no one would consider themselves to be a misfit of any sort.

The number of parties and social gatherings would decrease drastically. So would the attention-seeking status updates and selfies uploaded on Facebook.

Then again, interpersonal interaction would take on a whole new meaning - there would be fewer of "Awww you're my besssssttt friend"s and more meaningful conversations. Also since introverts find it hard to communicate in person, they might resort to texting more often than not - Facebook might not become obsolete after all.

There would probably no alpha-males - as in no one would be the life and soul of any group (if ever there would be any group activity then). Jokes cracked would be fewer too, as people would take more time in opening up to each other. Since no one would have the limelight on them, probably getting the attention of a crush would be easier (and fairer - as everyone would stand an equal chance) that way. (It is quite commonly observed that the extroverts end up walking away with the girl.)

Since introverts choose not to open up to people, the number of writers in the world would increase - diaries and personal blogs serve as excellent cathartic tools.

People would have smaller friend circles - and hence closer friends. Probably the friendship would be much more valued that way.

Also since approaching a stranger would be very tough, people might live all their lives with their feelings bottled up. Would that increase the number of arranged marriages? Well, probably yes! :)

That's all I could think of. I may be wrong, but then again, this is totally a hypothetical question right? So logically, there is no answer that could be classified as correct.

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