For those who don't know what a red flag is in the context of relationships, it is a warning sign that your relationship might not work out or will end soon. Most of us have ignored a red flag at least once in our lives. They always confuse us and leave us wondering about the fate of our relationships.
Sometimes we see many clear signs that our relationship is not in a secure state. We notice that things may go wrong in the future. Yet still, we choose to convince ourselves that everything is fine and tell ourselves that the relationship will have a happy ending. In the end, if things go wrong, we get heartbroken. We knew that things would go wrong, and when that happens, we can't help but feel sad about it.
But why does that happen? Why do we choose to overlook the red flags even after noticing them so clearly? Why do we keep holding on to a relationship even after we know that it's turning out to be toxic? Let's look at a few reasons why we do that.
We want the relationship to work
When we truly love someone, we want to have a successful relationship with them. Nobody wants a failed relationship with somebody whom they admire so much. We become desperate to make the relationship work out. We become so focused on making the relationship work that whenever we see red flags, we consider it as a minor inconvenience even though it has the potential to destroy the entire relationship.
We choose to focus on the potential of the relationship
Sometimes we see some red flags and acknowledge them. We do realize that these red flags are capable of destroying the relationship. However, we choose to be optimistic. We focus more on the potential of the relationship turning out to be successful, even after seeing many toxic things that are not healthy for the relationship.
We feel like we don't deserve that person
Sometimes we wonder how the other chose to be with us. We always look at how perfect they are and can't help but feel like we don't deserve them. We feel insecure that we are not good enough for the person we are with. Sometimes we even feel that they deserve someone better than us. So when they show some red flags, we choose to ignore them. We tell ourselves that we should be grateful that at least such an amazing person has spent a lot of time with us.
We hope that the person changes
Sometimes we notice that our beloved person has a change in behavior towards us. They seem to have lost interest in us. They seem to be avoiding us. They seem to be running away from us and not talking with us. We feel alarmed and extremely sad knowing that we are not wanted anymore. Their hurtful behavior is a clear sign that the relationship is certainly not going on a good path.
Yet we choose to stick to the relationship and ignore the big red flags that are right in front of us. We keep hoping that the person changes their behavior again. We keep wishing that things would go back to how it was before, but most of the time, that never happens.
We don’t want to face the truth
Sometimes we see that our relationships certainly won't work out in the future. The other person clearly shows that they don't love us anymore. We feel so sad to imagine about it that we don't even want to face the truth. We just keep hoping that everything turns out to be okay. We keep wishing that everything becomes fine again. We know that what we are doing is toxic, but we are too scared to face the truth.
We are lonely
Loneliness has often been a friend to many of us. Humans are social animals. We don't like being lonely all the time. We crave the company of people all the time. When it comes to people we love, we want to be in their company even more. So whenever we see red flags, we still choose to stick with them even if it's a toxic relationship. This is because we feel scared to be lonely again. We do that because we don't want to experience loneliness again.
Although there are many reasons why people choose to ignore red flags, it is always a good decision to consider the red flags. Choosing to ignore red flags and stick to the relationship is a toxic habit. It is always a good habit to address the red flags and talk about them with your partner. Good communication with your partner may help solve a lot of issues in an unstable relationship.