Are brides taking wedding aesthetics a little too far?
A bride has found herself on the wrong side of the internet after excluding her niece from her wedding invitation list.
Weddings are supposed to be celebrations of love, shared with friends and family. From time to time brides choose to exclude family members from their nuptials. This is not a problem in itself, after all a bride’s got to do what a bride’s got to do, right?
Unfortunately the reasons can sometimes be hurtful as in the case of a man who shared his heartbreaking experience on Reddit. When his sister, Tracey, issued the invitations she told him that the wedding was going to be child free. He has a daughter, Ella, aged 12 and asked if she could come but aunt Tracey said no, they were sticking to the rules.
As the wedding was out of town he had to arrange for a babysitter for Ella. He gets to the wedding and discovers that not only are there children there but his other siblings brought their children too.
“I should’ve known from before from my other siblings, but I never thought to ask them ‘oh are your kids going’. I did ask my brother at the wedding and he said he was told the child free limit was only for really young kids, the disruptive ages,” he reflected.
The man was understandably upset but waited until the reception ended to confront his sister about lying to him. She accused him of ambushing her wedding and thought he was making too much of a big deal over it.
The heartbroken dad admitted, “I sent a not-so-nice text back about her caring more about aesthetics than people. Now it’s sort of blown up within our family.”
Readers were curious to know what could have caused the bride to exclude her niece, with some suspecting the youngster may have behavioral issues.
“INFO: What reason did your sister have to purposely exclude only your daughter? Your sister is TA here but there’s gotta be more to this.”
“NTA. She was definitely dishonest with you concerning how child-free her wedding was and it being a wedding doesnt make it any less of a big deal. Now, maybe there is something about your child’s behavior that we don’t know about. But for me, my AH rating was based on how your sister gaslights you first, then gets “angry” next to try and stop the conversation. If she has a problem with your daughter’s behavior she needs to be honest and just say what it is.”
It was only when he provided more information that they completely understood why he was so heartbroken, and rallied around him in support of his reaction. His daughter’s arm was amputated after his (late) wife and daughter were involved in a road traffic accident.
“That’s why I said she cares more about aesthetics than people,” he clarified.
“After finding out the daughter had her arm amputated, OP’s sister is not only an AH, but a monster. OP, cut that toxicity from your life. As a dad, I’m just so angry for you. Big hugs from all of us here for you and your daughter,” fumed one reader.
Another commented, “So at the next family gathering Ella is going to find out that Aunt Tracey invited a lot of her cousins but purposely excluded her??
That’s messed up.”
Agreeing with the others one chipped in, “It’s beyond messed up. Ella is 12. She’s absolutely going to realize she was excluded for being an amputee. What a horrific way to further traumatize this child. I would NEVER talk to that monster again. And I’d let the rest of your family know exactly who she is. NTA.”
In some situations family members who are likely to put themselves and/or others at risk, or make others uncomfortable, should be excluded. If not then brides should not play the victim when there is backlash. “Own your reaction, and be accountable for the fact that the decision not to invite family is going to hurt people’s feelings, full stop,” advises an article by Offbeatwed.