Harmony— the challenge of achieving the feeling of peace and balance that we need

Narda Maren

Let go of those behaviors against your emotional balance.

Photo by Mabel Amber from Pexels

Life is complex; There is no doubt about that. However, human beings do not contribute to making it more manageable. We have harmful behaviors that our coexistence would be much more harmonious if we start letting go.

Here are nine of those harmful behaviors that we must learn to stop.

To compete with others

Is life a competition? Many people believe that it is. They want to have more money than the neighbor, a better position in the company than their co-worker, or the most beautiful couple of your friends.

What do you win with that? Living in constant competition with others wears you down, and in the end, you will feel empty since there will always be someone better than you.

Your competition must be with yourself. ​Set goals and achieve them, but not compare yourself to others.

To doubt your abilities

Why do we hesitate? I think out of fear, fear of failure, and fear of making the wrong decision. I am not saying that starting to believe in your abilities is easy, it is not, but it is definitely more advantageous.

A few years ago, I worked as a brand manager for a chain of stores. If someone had asked me a year before becoming a manager if I could do everything I did in detail, I would NEVER have imagined it.

We tend to underestimate ourselves, but you can’t imagine what you are capable of when faced with challenges. So if you can achieve great things when life challenges you, why doubt simpler things when they present themselves to you.

Analyze what your strengths are, and do not be afraid to exploit your capacity.

To want to know everything

“You do not have to know all the answers, but to know who does.” That is an interesting saying.

Who said you should know everything? Never. On the contrary, that you admit that you have doubts, that you should ask or investigate something, does not make us less intelligent.

Our brain has an unimaginable storage capacity, but pretending to have all the answers is unnecessary pressure.

Being curious and wanting to keep learning makes us smarter.

A Criticize others

Better than a thousand hollow words, is one word that brings peace.” — Buda.

A few years ago, I had a co-worker whom I considered smug. She always wanted to shine in meetings, in group emails, in short, in everything that was done as a team, but at the same time, I felt that she lacked empathy with others and worked for herself and just herself.

I commented to one of my co-workers that she was unbearable. Then I learned everything that had happened to her from a very young age.

Although her traumas did not justify her behavior, I realized that it is easy to criticize without knowing the background of things.

In addition to that, what good is that? If you think about it, criticizing is an act of cowardice. It is easier to murmur to another person than to talk to them face to face and let them know what you think of their behavior.

Simple, if what you will say about another person will not help you, her, or our environment, it is not worth saying.

Surround yourself with negative people

If you want to live in harmony, you must keep all negative people out of your life. Those people who do not add anything to you, on the contrary, subtract you.

I clarify, it is not that you turn your back on your friends or family in a difficult situation; But if a person is constantly negative, you will get that destructive energy.

Surround yourself with positive people, with good vibes and thoughts of growth.

To postpone what is important

You know that time is limited, right? Remember about that every time you think of putting something off.

I better do it tomorrow.” “Next year may be better for that investment.” “Next week I will go to see my parents, this week I am very busy with.”

We don’t know what tomorrow holds; things can change in a minute, so stop procrastinating. If you can do something today, do it. It can be something as simple as fixing your room or something more complex like starting to write that book you’ve always wanted.

Nobody will do it for you, so get to work.

To please everyone

The number one mistake. Wanting to satisfy everyone makes you constantly live with anxiety and pressure.

Were you born with a manual that says you should be okay with everyone around you? Learning to say NO is essential to achieve balance in life.

You must learn to be a little selfish and think of yourself first. If you seek to please everyone, there will always be someone who gets hurt, and most of the time, this person is you.

To live based on the expectations of others

This point goes hand in hand with the previous one. You do not have to be accountable for your achievements to anyone.

Our parents often want their children to fulfill what they did not achieve with the excuse that “they want us to be happy,” but their dreams are not yours.

We live in a society where we have set rules of all kinds, and breaking with that paradigm is the first thing you must do to live in harmony with yourself.

Maybe you are the best in the class, and that is why everyone thinks that you will be a great manager, engineer, or mathematician, but you prefer to be a musician.

If that’s what makes you happy, why waste your life on what others expect of you? I am not saying that you escape from your responsibilities, but that you should live by your perspective and not others.

It is your life, and you are the only one responsible for living it."

Not to live in the present

The reason for anxiety, depression, and many others sadness, “Not living in the present.”

I recently heard someone say that “you will never be as young as you are now.” That got me reflection. Every day that passes, the opportunity gives to have laughed more, learned more, forgiven more.

We become so focused on what tomorrow will bring, and we worry so much about what is harmful that we forget to enjoy what we have now. To value what life offers you today.

Some days are frustrating, but if you think about it, the days where positive things happen are many more, but we are not aware of that, or at least not enough.

When you act out the present-moment awareness, whatever you do becomes imbued with a sense of quality, care, and love — even the most simple action.”
― Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now.

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