Why America Doesn't Want You to Stay True to Yourself

And Mr. Mullet's 3 Tips on How to Stay True to Yourself

Photo by Mikail Duran on Unsplash

My big 3 ideas will change your life forever.

So what are the three ways you can learn how do you stay true to yourself?

How to Stay True to Yourself Idea # 1: Start laying meaningful bricks.

“Rome wasn’t built in a day, but they were laying bricks every hour.” — James Clear

As kids, society structures our days with routines, practices, and habits like brushing our teeth, drinking water, or waking up to school. Our white patriarchal society did this because to have civilization progress you must have the next generation pull their weight and shove the world ahead.

They want you to consume.

Stay in debt.

Be elite.

Get a nine to five.

Buy the house.

Get the mortgage.

Pay off the student debt.

Our business leaders and government have decided our country's financial progress is ahead of any class of people, race, or ideology.

Okay, I regress.

This piece is about raising consciousness, not lowering it.

Yet, as adults, or teenagers, we get the choice of what we want to do. What direction we want to head. How we want to react to the stimuli happening around us. Why we choose to do something or don’t do it.

As adults, as conscious beings, we can ask ourselves: “What is a meaningful life to me?”

“What does it look like day in and day out?”

And I think that’s where people get lost.

It’s hard because infinity is complex.

So could you keep it simple?

Small.

Short.

And keep repeating it over and over.

This is how you start staying true to yourself.

This is how you control spending and get out of debt.

This is how you start learning and

The question, “How do you stay true to yourself?” is really about asking yourself what you want to do with the time you have left on Earth (which we both know is finite)?

Time is the ultimate equalizer, yet when we are 19, or 30, or 45, we still feel invincible, immortal, and likely, unmotivated to really change our path or how we use our time day in and day out.

This is why we get fat.

This is why we get stuck in a job we don’t find purpose in.

This is why we get addicted to substances.

Because we don’t have meaning anymore.

Yet, even under the bleakest of situations and circumstances, you have to ask yourself: “Can you change the direction of your current life?”

My bet is you are reading this because you believe you can.

You want more.

Well, fuck yeah, I want more too.

But let’s get really clear on how to change your life and stay true to yourself.

Here is my stay true to yourself math formula:

Meaningful acts + growth mindset * daily time invested = life purpose

If you truly believed in yourself, that you could learn the thing, do the act, focus the energy — you wouldn’t be reading this.

So let’s start there.

Change your mindset first:

Believe you are worth it.

Believe you are capable of doing whatever you put your intention into.

Believe you are capable of waking up at 6:00 am to run for ten minutes, write for the minutes, learn something new for ten minutes, meditate for ten minutes, lift weights for ten minutes, walk the dog, study comedy, take a MasterClass on poetry, and practice the art of meaning.

Okay, but what if you don’t know what you want to do?

Think about the times in your life when you were delighted. Smiling. Laughing. Feeling accomplished. Good about yourself.

When I think about these thoughts, I go back in time.

When I was a kid, I’d write, draw, and make music.

I’d stay in the driveway and shoot hoops for hours.

I’d play video games.

I’d run around the neighborhood with my bike gang.

As an adult, I do (or did) none of that.

Why did I stop doing the thing that gave me meaning?

How does starting small relate to staying true to yourself?

Because if my ego is telling me to walk in the opposite direction of meaning and the only way to win out over the ego and the life it creates for us is by changing the smallest of routines, systems, or habits that help us become our best selves and our most meaningful selves.

This could be as little as getting in the habit of doing 10 pushups a day.

Reading 10 pages a day. Running 10 minutes day. Shutting down your electronics at 10:00 pm every day. Standing at my desk while I type for 10 minutes a day. See if you have a system that increases your meaning, you can beat your dopamine drip. You can beat your worse self, the ego, that ugly monkey monster that never stops chatting away while trying to achieve purpose with your life.

Cut out the ego, and you will find meaning everywhere.

How to Stay True to Yourself Tip #2: James Clear said the highest mastery level is simplicity.

And I agree.

We can get nothing done if our system or life is too complicated. Can we do the simple routines and patterns that the world’s most meaningful humans do over and over, in our own way?

Does health mean anything to you?

Build into your life.

Does creativity mean anything to you?

Build into your life.

How to Stay True to Yourself Tip #3: You don’t stumble onto meaning; you build it into your life.

10 minutes a day is all it takes to start learning how to stay true to yourself.

This is simple life mastery. But how will you get there if you can’t focus on 10 minutes today?

Tomorrow.

And the day after is always about what you do right now.

My ego tells me, “Trevor, you better get a nine to five. You better start making more money. You better eat that bar of chocolate right now. No, don’t work out. You are tired. You are old. You are too busy.”

The ego thinks there is only one way to do something.

But that isn’t true.

I’ve found many ways to make a living without a nine to five.

I’ve built a startup.

I invested in real estate.

I sailed on a boat I bought for $5,000 through the Caribbean (and actually saved money without a job in our BEAT THE JONES American society). So yes, my ego doesn’t want to do any of this being better stuff–from investing to startups to fitness– until it comes down to wanting to be recognized for it. Oh, then that greedy little sucker wants all the status, popularity, and fame (and drama). Yet, like losing basketball teams, countries, or businesses, the ego dominates the culture and doesn’t want to do any work or sharing or teamwork to get there, yet wants all the notoriety. The basis for teaching kids to adults how to create a purposeful life is about how to get out of your own way and practice simplicity.

This is what I’ve learned: if you don’t practice a system, you are left to the parts and barriers inside you that are very, very good at negotiating who you will become (for better or worse) tomorrow.

And mostly, don't let the patriarch tell you who you are supposed to be and what you are supposed to buy-- screw the Jones family.

Find your own status symbol to celebrate-- FREEDOM!