What do I think about in the shower?

Well, usually it’ll start with thinking about the shower, just water and things, right?

Then I’ll move on to thinking about my day, and usually about the things I felt could have gone better during my day. What I could have done better, what the consequences of doing that thing would have been, and what the consequences of the decision I made are. I’ll question every detail that went into my day, like a specific word that someone said, and why they said that word, and not a different one. Does that mean they dislike me? Did they ever like me? Are they just pretending to be my friend??

Then I will spin myself into another tizzy, about something or other. But soon, my mind will start to wander off my day, and onto bigger things. I wonder about how the universe works, or if fate is real. If religion is all a lie, or if we are really just an egg in a giants universe. If every action I take means nothing in the long run because time is not actually flowing, but a fixed line, a fifth dimension. If the day was bad, I’ll wonder if the universe has it out for me. If it was good, I’ll wonder what I did right, and try to keep doing that. Past all this, onto new horizons, I’ll think about tomorrow.

What I have to do, what is planned, and who I’m going to see. What I have to do, what I want to do, and what is probably going to happen. I’ll wonder about the best case scenario, and the worst case that could happen tomorrow. Finally, I’ll go over things in my mind, like what I still have to do after the shower, or what I forgot today.

Then I’ll turn the water off, and get out of the shower.

Once I leave, I’ll go back out into the world, to live for another day.

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Take a peek into my life - New mum in town!

Los Angeles, CA
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