Is it wrong for me to tell my friend to move her wedding date?

Modern Parent

My college friend recently asked me to be in her bridal party. We were once very close, even roommates for two years, but since I moved to a new city with my partner, we’ve grown somewhat apart. We still talk once or twice a month for an hour at a time, so it wasn’t a surprise when she asked me to be in her bridal party. I wouldn’t have been offended if she left me out since I’m not as close to her as I once was.

My friend got engaged a few weeks ago and called me and the other bridesmaids asking if we could make an October wedding work because her dream venue had a cancellation. I know how much she’s wanted this venue for a while, so I agreed to help speed up the planning.

But here’s where things get complicated: her fiancé’s twin brother got married just before the pandemic, and his wife is due to give birth on the same day as my friend’s wedding at the venue in California. Both families would need to take a plane to get there, but her fiancé’s family has been urging her to move the wedding away from the SIL’s due date. It’s unclear how her fiancé feels, but I do know that he was his brother’s best man at his wedding. Understandably, the twin has since withdrawn his commitment to be the best man at my friend’s wedding.

My friend doesn’t understand why the twin can’t just fly home if the baby comes during the wedding weekend. I’m not as close to her as I once was, but I still feel a responsibility as a bridesmaid to advise her. At the same time, I don’t want to damage our friendship. But, even if the SIL doesn’t go into labor that weekend, shouldn’t her husband be with her? My friend and I don’t see eye to eye on this, but it seems no one on her side has been vocal about the situation.

If I tell my friend that I think the wedding should be moved because of the conflict with the SIL’s due date, would I be in the wrong? I understand how much this venue means to her, but I don’t think starting her married life with her fiancé’s family on the wrong foot is the best move. Can I advise her gently or offer a compromise?

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