Photo by Valerie Elash on Unsplash
Do you ever find yourself questioning your happiness and continually trying to improve it? If you’re anything like me, the answer is “yes, all the time.”
Relationships can be difficult. It’s easy to get into arguments, confrontations, and disagreements about almost anything when one of you is having a bad day.
However, the implementation of daily habits can allow your relationship to prosper due to a mutual level of commitment and respect for the other person.
As a self-confessed personal development junkie, I have a tendency to spend the majority of my time researching & implementing different habits to optimize each aspect of my life.
So recently, I’ve been practicing daily habits within my relationships which have allowed me to live a much happier life.
If you want to improve the level of satisfaction within your relationship, these strategies might help you. Some of them can be implemented immediately. Others will take time to become a reality. But they work.
1. Give without expectation
This is one of the most important habits that will improve your relationship. When you are focused solely on giving, and not what you shall get in return, your dedication towards the satisfaction of your partner will increase tremendously.
But how do you give if you are unsure if the kindness will be reciprocal? You do it anyway.
Every single day, make it your duty to instill a foundation of kindness into the relationship. In the words of Charles Glassman, “giving without expectation leads to receiving without limitation.”
2. Use sex to improve your intimacy
I get it, you don’t have time. Or maybe you don’t feel like it because you’ve had a long day at work & merely want to go to sleep. But it’s often these very attitudes that lead to dissatisfaction within a relationship. Remember, your level of intimacy in bed often sets a precedent for every other aspect of your love.
3. Communicate your desires.
Most couples will happily testify that communication is the most important factor towards longevity within a relationship. Talking about your hopes for the future will keep the flame burning bright, and allow you both to understand what each person hopes to gain from the relationship.
When you communicate on a profound level, you are no longer forced to make assumptions about your partner's desires. You have clarity on the future of your relationship, their dreams, and what makes them happy.
4. Take ownership of your mistakes
We all make mistakes within our relationships; nobody is perfect. However, it is how we respond & move forward that defines our character as a long-term partner.
There will be times where you make horrific errors which you don’t want to tell your partner. But remember that you have a choice: tell the truth or lie to your partner. The choice is yours.
5. Accept Your Partners flaws.
So many of us are focusing on trying to create the perfect life that we stop becoming appreciative of what we already have. Concentrate on how lucky you are to be in a relationship with your partner, and how you will treasure each moment spent with them. Epicurus said it best:
“Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.”
6. Always be honest.
I meet dishonest people almost every day. And the reason I recognize them as liars is that I used to be one: I said whatever was necessary to make circumstances fit my own agenda. Consequentially, each aspect of my relationships suffered from little hope of rebuilding the trust.
But once I made the conscious decision to tell the truth, no matter the repercussions, my relationships drastically improved. See, people have a natural tendency to respect honest people because there are so few of them.
Strive to be honest, and you’ll always find a way forward. Your partner will still respect you for making a mistake. However, they may not if they discover that you’re a liar.
7. Be empathetic towards other people’s point of view
Empathy teaches you to become a better person and to put yourself in the shoes of someone else.
You are going to have arguments. You’re going to disagree with your partner. But when you seek to understand instead of criticize, it becomes much easier to move forward.
8. Get rid of unnecessary distractions
Do you have a goal to spend less time on your phone so you can be more present with your lover, for example? Getting rid of unnecessary distractions such as picking up your phone during awkward conversations is a good way to start.
9. Support each other’s goals
This is self-explanatory. If you can’t be supportive of your partner, you’re probably with the wrong person.
10. Spend time apart
Think about how happy you feel when you see your partner at the airport after weeks of not being together. Or the emotions that run through your mind after not seeing a close friend for years. There’s nothing better than that.
Most people think that spending time apart is detrimental to their relationship. But when done in moderation, it can be extremely healthy.
The point is to develop habits that will allow you to overcome any challenges faced within the future of your relationship. Because although you cannot change your circumstances, you shall always have control over how you adapt to them.
Epictetus said it best: “it is not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.”