Mom terminates her own parental rights so she doesn't have to pay when teen daughter is admitted to psych ward

Mary Duncan

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events as told to me by a family member who experienced them firsthand; used with permission.

https://img.particlenews.com/image.php?url=2XD0rX_0lC7VdF000
Photo byZhivko MinkovonUnsplash

When I was in my early thirties I had a bit of a mental breakdown and ended up in what my local psychiatric hospital calls their “Intensive Outpatient Program” or, IOP. The IOP required me to attend in-person group and personal therapy sessions that went from 9 am to 1 pm for five days a week, for six weeks. I was lucky to be unemployed at this time or else I never would have been able to complete the program, despite the fact that the unemployment is partially what got me there in the first place.

As an adult, I was on my own at the time to get help for myself. I had to set up my own appointments, be responsible enough to get there on time every day and be dedicated to doing the work to get better. However, without the constant help and support from my family and friends, I probably never would have gotten through those six weeks and pulled myself together.

What I learned in my time in the IOP is that mental healthcare is healthcare. It’s not a subsidiary of health, it is part of overall wellness to have your mind in good standing.

If I had cancer, say, and not depression and anxiety, I’m sure my family and friends wouldn’t write it off as being a character flaw. They would tell me to “just buck up and get over it” or let me go without the help of medical professionals. But with mental healthcare, things are much different.

I was horrified a few weeks ago when my seventeen-year-old daughter Tori told me about what happened to one of her friends and classmates, Jana.

I had known Jana for years and had seen her struggle with her mental health all throughout her adolescence and early teen years while her parents went through a terrible divorce. As a good friend to Tori, Jana spent many nights sleeping over at our house and I watched Jana decline until I finally asked her if she was seeing a therapist. She wasn’t, and so I admittedly stepped beyond my boundaries and contacted the school to let the school psychologist know he should reach out to Jana.

Months later Tori tells me that Jana has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, but that her mother, who she lived with now that her parents were divorced, did not want to put her on medication because she couldn’t afford it.

Jana slowly spiraled out of control and after a number of outbursts at school, she was taken from school directly to the hospital for emergency psychological evaluation, at which point doctors determined she should be admitted for treatment.

Well, Jana’s mother went ballistic. Not having health insurance, and knowing that her new ex-husband did not have it either, she knew that this would cost her a fortune.

Jana’s mom did a thing I can’t imagine any other parent in the world doing to their child. She went to the courthouse to terminate her own parental rights of her seventeen-year-old child so that she wouldn’t be responsible for her any longer.

When Jana was released from the hospital, she went directly to the care of her aunt and uncle who lived a few towns over, and by some miracle, the school made arrangements for her to finish her senior year there without having to transfer to a new district. They probably just felt terrible about what her mother did to Jana.

What do you think about what Jana’s mother did to her?

Hi, I hope you enjoyed this story! I am a freelance writing single mom trying to create a better life for me and my daughter through words. If you enjoyed this, please consider leaving a small donation: https://ko-fi.com/maryduncan

Read full story in "NewsBreak" App
# Relationships# Family# Health# Money# Lifestyle

Comments / 254

Published by

I write about the weird complexities of relationships to make a better life for me and my daughter through words. https://ko-fi.com/maryduncan

Connecticut State
127K followers

More from Mary Duncan

Teen boy wants to change gender, but in the 1990s parents do everything to stop him

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events I experienced firsthand; used with permission.*. When I was in kindergarten there was a set of fraternal twins in my class, Corinne and Christopher. Though they weren’t of the same gender, it didn’t matter to them. Their twin-ship made them inseparably close to each other and they rarely stepped out of their own little world to play with us other kids. It was the mid-eighties at the time, and when their mother cut Corinne’s hair into a bob and Christopher still sported a bowl cut, there were times it was hard to tell them apart, their faces were so similar.

Read full story
19 comments

Couple with new baby secretly moves away so mother-in-law can no longer drop in unexpectedly

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events as told to me by a friend who experienced them firsthand; used with permission.*. I didn’t exactly take the life course that most parents probably want their daughters to take. I didn’t go to college right out of high school, deciding to move out and get a job waitressing instead, and a few years after that I was unmarried and pregnant. I was alone, well, with my mother when my daughter was born, but I was a single mom from the start.

Read full story
197 comments

“You know you’re not really pretty, right?” Grandma tells little girl after she gets her ears pierced

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events I experienced firsthand; used with permission.*. I have always believed that what people do with their bodies and the changes they want to make to them, should be their choice and their choice alone. As in, a parent shouldn’t be able to alter their child’s body without their consent. You would never put a tattoo on your baby, right? But many parents have no problem at all piercing their baby’s ears when they are still infants and can’t make that choice for themselves. Sure, you can argue that earrings aren’t permanent, you can always take them out, but that doesn’t mean that they may leave a permanent scar.

Read full story
40 comments

Jealous woman tells neighbor to build a taller fence for his wife because her husband keeps watching her swim

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events I experienced firsthand; used with permission.*. The wildest thing that ever happened in my neighborhood growing up was when The Mercers painted their whole house matte black to mess with the neighbors who hated what they had done. All of the neighbors were beside themselves that the house was not only now a black eyesore but also had a full overgrown yard of wildflowers - not the neatly manicured grass of every other house on the block.

Read full story
8 comments

“Are you okay?” Affair revealed when wife reads texts from mistress while husband is unconscious

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events as told to me by a friend who experienced them firsthand; used with permission.*. A few days ago I wrote about how my good friend Thea found out her husband was cheating on her while she was still in the maternity ward after having their second child.

Read full story
27 comments

Mother disowns daughter when daughter learns baby has Down syndrome and aborts the child

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events as told to me by a friend who experienced them firsthand; used with permission.*. I must admit that I never wanted to be a mother. My half-sister is twelve years younger than me, so I was old enough and mature enough when she was born and going through infancy and toddlerhood to know that I wanted nothing to do with parenting. She was only about six years old when I moved out of the family home, so we aren’t close, which is sad now, but I guess that is what happens when some siblings are born so far apart.

Read full story
313 comments

“I will stand and wait here all day,” woman tells pushy cashier in busy store filled with self-checkout machines

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events I experienced firsthand; used with permission.*. I recently learned that it took only sixty-six years to go from the Wright brothers making their first flight in an airplane to Neil Armstrong stepping out onto the Moon.

Read full story
368 comments

Woman catches her brother-in-law cheating while her sister is still in the hospital after delivering their son

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events as told to me by a friend who experienced them firsthand; used with permission.*. My friend Thea discovered that her husband was having an affair while she was still in the maternity ward after giving birth to their second child. Her husband, Ryan, had told Thea that he’d been called into work and would get paid double for coming in as they were so desperate, and since Thea and their new son Oliver were doing fine and supposed to go home the next day, she agreed. Thea’s reasoning was, even if Ryan had stayed in the hospital with her all night with their newborn he wouldn’t have gotten any sleep while she was up nursing the baby, and would be more useful to them both if he were making money instead.

Read full story
21 comments

“You’ll never make it,” Teacher crushes dreams of young student, makes her cry in front of class

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events I experienced firsthand; used with permission.*. I have two terrible memories of being in school, and both of them have led to anxieties that I have carried with me for all of my life.

Read full story
15 comments

“It was too hard to get around in here.” Mother-in-law has kitchen island removed without permission while housesitting

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events as told to me by a family member who experienced them firsthand; used with permission. Sometimes I try to imagine what it would be like to marry my boyfriend and have his mother, Luanne, become my mother-in-law. I already know Luanne doesn’t care for me, as I am thirteen years younger than my boyfriend’s ex and she thinks her son left his wife to satiate his need for a younger woman. I know this is not the case and I am comfortable with our age difference, but it definitely makes Luanne a bit suspicious.

Read full story
90 comments

Waitress gives friend and co-worker all her tip money when friend doesn’t make enough during shift to pay babysitter

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events I experienced firsthand; used with permission.*. For many years I worked at a very busy family-owned restaurant in town and made some great friends with the other waitresses while I was there.

Read full story
22 comments

Neighbor accuses man of being a peeping tom when he swims in his pool at night, can see in her lighted windows

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events as told to me by a family member who experienced them firsthand; used with permission. When I was growing up my family was close to our next-door neighbors, the Mercers. The Mercers were the bane of my neighborhood’s existence after they painted their house black to show off their lawn flamingos, but the Mercers were great to us and we loved their company. We would often have picnics with them in the summer, exchange gifts on holidays and birthdays, and of course, I got free use of their pool any time I wanted.

Read full story
74 comments

Mom wants to kick teen daughter out of house when she dyes her hair blue, dad shaves his head in protest

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events as told to me by a friend who experienced them firsthand; used with permission.*. When I was a teenager I started experimenting with hair color without my parent’s permission. When I was a junior in high school and only sixteen years old at the time, I got my first job and had my first paycheck that I could spend or save for anything I wanted. It didn’t take me long to go and find myself the perfect shade of fire-engine red to dye my blondish hair.

Read full story
116 comments

“You shouldn’t be allowed to have a baby,” staunch Christian tells gay couple who wants a child of their own

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events I experienced firsthand; used with permission.*. After one of my best friends Terry and his husband Doug had finally been legally married in our state, something that was very important to them and they waited for a very long time, they decided that it was time to bring a child into their family.

Read full story
261 comments

“I’ll find a girlfriend who’ll lend me money,” says unemployed, cheating husband who won’t get a job

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events as told to me by a friend who experienced them firsthand; used with permission.*. For all of my adult life, I have been a strong, independent woman who has not relied on a man’s support or income to sustain me or my teenage daughter, Tori. For the first time in my life, I’m living with a man, my boyfriend of three years, and I’m currently in a position where I make and contribute more money than he does.

Read full story
35 comments

Mom plans fake trip to Disneyworld to teach her children a harsh lesson about lying

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events as told to me by a friend who experienced them firsthand; used with permission.*. I’m no professional when it comes to childhood development, so I am not sure where or when children learn to lie to their parents, siblings, or others. The first time I remember my daughter Tori telling a whopper of a lie was when she was about five years old.

Read full story
15 comments

“I knew you could afford a great one.” Woman collects husbands for wedding rings and then divorces them

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events as told to me by a family member who experienced them firsthand; used with permission. This past fall my little sister Grace got married to my new brother-in-law, Rich. I was surprised and offended that more than one person asked whether it bothered me that my little sister was getting married before me. The fact was, it did and it didn’t bother me.

Read full story
13 comments

“I packed for you, can you be out by Sunday?” Man cheats and files for divorce, blindsiding wife of 20 years

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events as told to me by a family member who experienced them firsthand; used with permission. In almost all of the cases of infidelity I’ve ever heard about, and it’s so sadly common, I’ve heard an awful lot of stories, it’s most often the cheating man who moves out of the house when his dalliances are exposed.

Read full story
56 comments

“You don’t deserve a steak,” Woman tells a single mom using SNAP benefits to pay for her groceries

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events as told to me by a friend who experienced them firsthand; used with permission.*. When I was younger and my daughter Tori was in elementary school, I was laid off from my office job and luckily was able to collect unemployment until I was able to get back on my feet again. At the time Tori and I were living alone together in a trailer park and when I lost my job I was terrified of what might happen to us. I quickly budgeted out all of my money, cut back on all of my expenses, and applied for every bit of aid I qualified for to ensure that we could stay where we lived so Tori could stay in her school district.

Read full story
1782 comments

Comments / 0

Community Policy