Woman fed up with “friend’s” bad behavior calls CPS and has her children removed from home

Mary Duncan

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events I experienced firsthand; used with permission.*

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What would you do if you had a friend who you thought was a horrible mother and doing things that will cause irreparable damage to their children? Would you stand by and watch and quietly not say anything because there is a well known but unwritten rule among mothers that you don’t criticize each other’s parenting? Or would you do something about it?

Years ago I was friends with a woman who was a very questionable mother, in my opinion.

She was a hoarder, for one thing, and lived in a filthy house that was jam packed with junk she didn’t need. It was so bad that it was treacherous to walk around in her house, especially on the stairs. I always worried that if there were a fire that the place would go up in flames in a second and they wouldn’t be able to escape the mess.

On top of that, she was a drug dealer that had people coming and going from her apartment at all hours of the day and night. Meaning when her children was home she was dealing drugs. And smoking them. It was very bad.

To top it all off, she was one of those believers in holistic medicine and not getting vaccines, so her kids were constantly sick and missing school, and they were a threat to other people.

Though not taking your kids to a real doctor when they need it isn’t a crime, some of the other things definitely are, and after years of watching her do this and get away with it, I had enough. When I say get away with it I just mean, no one else ever did anything to confront her or stop her bad behavior.

I wish I’d had the guts to just confront her about her behavior, but I thought doing that would only cause a fight, not anything to get resolved.

So, I took the nuclear option instead. I anonymously called CPS on her. I called Child Protective Services behind my friend’s back, and had her children removed from her home.

She had to go through a lot to get them back full time and in her home, and the children were safe with their father for the duration. I felt awful about it, of course, but at the same time I felt a great relief knowing that by the time she got her kids back she would have changed her ways and her lifestyle enough so that they could come back safely.

What do you think you would have done?

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I write about relationships and parenting, life, society, people, and sometimes also beer.

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