Opinion: Low Sex Drive In Men Is Linked To Stress

Libby Shively McAvoy
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Has your man seemed distant lately? Maybe he doesn’t seem attracted to you anymore. Is he having an affair? Is he not in love with you anymore? Did you do something wrong? I get it; all these thoughts are bouncing around in your mind. But ladies, there is a good chance it has nothing to do with you.

If your man is suddenly sexually shut down, having a face-to-face conversation about what is happening is a good idea. My man recently explained to me that his shutting down is stress-related. Boy, what a relief for me, although I feel bad that he is so stressed. I felt so rejected before he explained. Now, I feel his love more than ever.

Scientific Reason Behind The Sexual Shut Down

Stress hormones cause blood vessels to narrow. This restricts blood flow to the penis, making an erection difficult. Even men who typically have no problem with arousal may not be able to get an erection when overly stressed.

Anxiety can also prevent women from getting lubricated enough to enjoy sex.

Other Forms Of Intimacy

Sexual connection is excellent, passionate, and in some ways, is the ultimate connection between man and woman. However, the body and mind are connected. Sexual intimacy requires an emotional bond; when stressed, that is the primary thing on the mind, not your connection.

Find other ways to share intimacy. Some options include taking a bubble bath, snuggling, and taking a walk holding hands. I found that my man needed to talk and vent sometimes. Other times he preferred silence. We spent a lot of time just holding hands.

When one of the four forms of intimacy, emotional, physical, intellectual, and spiritual, is out of balance, talking about it and finding other ways to remain close is essential.

Final Thoughts

It is critical not to add more pressure onto your partner. If they are brave enough to admit what is going on in their life, they have enormous trust in you. Admitting weakness is difficult for a man. Be supportive. He doesn’t need you to “fix him” but to hear him and understand.

Have no fears; your sexual chemistry will return, and you will already be more potent as a couple when it does. Meanwhile, be patient. Ask your partner if there is anything you can do to be more supportive.

And remember, you can always masturbate to satisfy your own needs while your partner gets through this difficult time. He may even enjoy watching you.

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Libby is a Personal Development and Relationship coach specializing in emotional intelligence. By blending motivational speaking, leading yoga and wellness retreats, and writing, she has mastered the art of living her best life while helping others.

Cincinnati, OH

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