7 Ways to Heal Your Broken Heart

L.A. Strucke

We start to heal when we let them go

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The person you loved so much is gone. You’ve been walking around in a fog. You can’t believe life has gone so wrong. One minute they were there beside you, the next minute they were gone. Everything around you reminds you of them – the songs on your playlist, places you two went together, and mutual friends. You miss them so much. No one seems to understand the pain that you are going through. You feel like you’re never going to get over this.

Yet you must. There are millions of people in this world- and somewhere your future partner is waiting in the wings for you to let go of the one who hurt you and move on to a happier life with them.

Here are 7 ways to heal your broken heart.

1. Let go of the fantasy of your life together

When you’re in love with someone, you have a picture in your mind of what your life together is going to be like. And when the relationship is over, your hopes and dreams for the two of you go up in smoke. Now, not only are you suffering the physical loss of not hearing the voice you loved each day, or holding them in your arms, your vision of a life spent together is gone. And that hurts- a lot.

You’re going to have to do some serious work to end that fantasy. Start focusing on everything that was wrong in your relationship.

When we miss someone, we tend to remember the good and not the bad. We are romanticizing our partners. They were our addiction and we feel better remembering the good times with them. Yet this will not help us get over them. We need to remember the bad times, especially when we’re trying to let them go. In this situation, you’re better off focusing on the things that will help you be glad it’s over. Remember the arguments, the coldness, and the unfaithfulness. Remember all the nights you cried. Realize that you deserve better.

2. Avoid social media

When you’re trying to get over someone, the worst thing you can ever do is to go on social media and check out your ex’s page. Many people move on quickly, and the last thing a person with a broken heart wants to see is pictures of their ex with their new flame having a great time without them.

You need to block their number and all their pages. Whatever you do, don’t start stalking their friend’s pages. They may be posting photos of your ex, hurting you all over again. It’s not worth the pain.

3. Avoid places where you may run into them

Until you are completely over your ex, it’s a good idea to avoid going to all the places you shared. There are plenty of stores you can shop at, that your ex has never been to. There are lots of new restaurants that you won’t see them at. Churches have different services. Don’t torture yourself by going to the same places they went to.

As time goes on, you’ll get stronger. The longer you are away from them, the more it will help you forget them.

4. Call your friends

This is the time to lean on your friends. Yes, life will go on without your partner. Your friends will remind you of what an awesome person you are. Some will enjoy telling you how they knew all along that your ex was wrong for you.

Spend time with your friends, having good times. After a while, you will forget the person that used to sit beside you. There will new people sitting beside you, and new exciting experiences.

5. Work on yourself

Once you don’t have someone to distract you constantly, it’s a great time to work on yourself. Start exercising at home or the gym, and take long peaceful walks outside in beautiful places. You can get a new haircut, cut out junk food, and start eating right. You can meditate or take a yoga class. Have fun and get a facial, massage, or a pedicure. It's all about feeling good about yourself.

You may choose to get counseling and work on any issues you have so that you’ll be in a healthy state of mind when you meet a new prospect. You’ll feel great about yourself, and feel your best, and it will help attract better partners to you.

Plan a getaway

When your heart is broken, it’s hard to imagine going on a vacation by yourself, but that may be exactly what you need.

It’s time to let go of the past and fill your life with some new and amazing experiences. Take a cruise or a trip abroad. You may meet an intriguing stranger. I know more than one person who met their future spouse abroad.

If there’s a pandemic going on, you can travel to a secluded shore location where you can bask in the warm summer breeze and listen to the waves slap against the shore. You can visit a town you always wanted to see, go on a camping trip, or take an RV trip somewhere. The sky is the limit. Go on as many adventures as you can. Start doing all the things that you always wanted to do. No one is holding you back.

Make a new life change with school or your career

Now is the time for positive changes. You can put your all into your career now. There’s no one taking up all your valuable time anymore. You can put all your hours into advancing your career. It's a good time to take classes online to further your career, and finish the degree you started long ago. This time period in your life can be empowering for you.

There will be times when you're overwhelmed

Every one heals at a different rate. Take your time, and go at your own pace. Some days will be worse than others. One person may get over someone the second they meet someone new. For others, it takes a few months, and for others it takes years. Some people never get over the one they loved.

The sad thing about that is while they are wasting their entire life longing for someone they can’t have, precious years are flying by. As time goes on, romantic opportunities don’t come as often.

And while they are wasting away pining for them, the person they thought was the love of their life has moved on. They’re getting married, having a family, and their old romance with the one they left behind is the last thing on their mind.

Start loving yourself as much as you loved them

Treat yourself like a prize. Know you are fully deserving of a long and lasting love with someone who loves you just as much. Don’t settle for less.

And in the meantime, be kind to yourself. Give to yourself. Use this time alone to wipe away your tears, and grow into the best version of yourself.

Remember: You are lovable and strong, and you won’t be alone for long.

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