Wanna Understand Women? Listen To This New Song From TikTok

Jewel Eliese


Remember when President Trump wanted to take away TikTok?

It wasn't long ago; Maybe you felt rebellious like I did (as much as a small-town midwestern girl can, anyway), and decided to download this app you'd only ever read about.

Maybe you too never really planned on using it.

Until you did.

For me by the time I tried it, it was legal and never banned. TikTok was still on my phone and I thought I would check it out before deleting it.

{Insert "oh no" song here.}

Fast forward to today. I still have the app, and it makes me giggle in the middle of the night.

However, I have learned a few things from TikTok

  • Booktok. So excited about all the books I'm learning about. Furyborn? ACOTAR? Yes, please.
  • There are Christians on the app, and man it gets to be inspirational and spiritual.
  • Therapy. Learn a few tips about how to make yourself a better person.
  • I'm old as apparently anyone born before 1994 is. That's right, I was born before the 1990s even. Terrifying.
  • Bops. They can create amazing music with TikTok from incredible creators.

Like this one.

I'm Not Pretty

One night this week I was scrolling TikTok while my husband clicked through the computer. You know, the modern family scene. I found one video I thought was cool and showed it to him as I tend to. It either makes him actually laugh out loud or simply enjoy it as we did this one.

A woman, Jessia, was singing in her car about Bums (ie butts). She wrote it and was unsure if it was a 'bop' or any good. A man, Elijah Woods, (not Frodo for those elders like me) assured her it was a bop then proceeded to mix guitar, drums, and more behind her vocals.

We, the TikTok watchers, felt like we were a part of the creation of this song.

Then she, in another video, reacted to what he'd made. We again watched her joy as she squealed and danced to her own song.

Verses were added.

Her views grew.

People were loving the song.

Including me.

I went on again (see the trend here), to see the song has been released everywhere you can buy songs. And for the first time heard all the words.

I felt understood, pumped up by the music, sad, yet put in a better mood. I listened multiple times, singing out loud in the shower, the water my own drum.

And I realized, this song is important.

It's a hit. It reaches to the core of women, not because of beauty but because of the world we live in and the bodies were supposed to have.

But what's more, when men are bopping along, they get a hint of what we feel daily.

What People Are Already Saying:

AesthxticMoonx 21 hours ago

This song is literally screaming how many teenage girls feel, but this song has a special meaning tho. Selflovee ❤

unknown user 21 hours ago

I didn't know someone wrote a song about me

Cassandra 1 day ago

I hope this gets played on the radio in like 5 years and I can tell my daughter how it all started. You rock girl 🖤

Wan Nisa 8 hours ago

When I first heard this song on TikTok I was like "its fun" "its catchy" but I search for the lyrics. Damn! The lyrics say anything about me being insecure about myself, my weight, and my everything but all the lyrics said Love Myself. The lyrics got me the most is “Every other song says I’m beautiful, but what if I don’t feel like I’m beautiful?”

Shawne Webster1 day ago

This honestly helped me with how I’ve been feeling about myself since I got pregnant. It’s already been saved to my playlist

Gurl 15bored 21 hours ago

I feel this 😭 like despite ppl saying I'm pretty, my mind tells me otherwise

Let's take a look

Maybe i'm not pretty, maybe i'm just fun
'cause i got a belly and i got a bum
And i'm f***n' jelly of all the other ones
With their itty bitty bellies and
Their rump ump ump ums

I don't know of a single woman who doesn't sometimes wonder or think she knows she's not pretty. Do we have to be pretty? Heck, no. Are we expected to be? Yes, so it can hurt.

If we're not pretty, can we only then be considered 'fun'?

And then it goes on to talk about bums. First off, bum is just a fun word.

But this part is so true. And not just for teenagers with self-image issues but for the new mothers who are getting used to their new shape. For mothers and women in general as we change.

Be proud of it.

And be proud of the itty bitty bellies around you. Support them.

And dance to the rump ump ump ums.

I know that i should love myself
But it's getting kinda hard when you're
Constantly feeling like garbage
Know i shouldn't hurt myself
But i can't find a way to lose weight
Without literally starving

Let me just say that first line again. "I know that I should love myself."

We all hear the message and know that we're supposed to be happy with how we look. To be okay with the love handles stretch marks, or what others consider too many pounds.

We know it but that doesn't mean it's not hard.

Our culture still prizes a certain kind of beauty. You only have to watch a youtube video, see the ads, or still see a magazine cover to know it. Even children's cartoons emphasize beauty. For example, my daughter thinks that only girls can have long eyelashes and that, plus some awesome makeup makes someone beautiful.

She even wants to wear makeup and I tell her how lovely she is with her fly-away morning hair and hazel eyes.

When we look in the mirror we can feel like garbage. Do you?

And the weight part of this verse?


Sure we have people who are naturally skinny. But body types are different. It's such an obvious statement but it needs to be said.

And because of that, not all can lose weight so easily or at the same rate as others. And some do literally starve.

Every other song says i'm beautiful
But what if i don't feel like i'm beautiful?
I wish my body image didn't say
That i should be another kinda way

Again, we know, we hear that others think we're beautiful. Yet, there's that one problem again. Actions speak so much louder than words. We can still feel ugly even with songs telling us otherwise.

And it's like our bodies do the speaking.

Our body image is telling us we should be another way. Unfortunately, the thoughts in our heads are louder than those spoken by people we love.

Do you feel this way?

I'm not gonna ask for help
'cause all you're gonna say is
"you'rе perfect and oh you're so worth it"
But sometimes i hate myself
I get inside my head and i think that
I somehow deserve this

Many people have issues with their self-image and do need help. This topic is real and deadly. And yes, men and women don't reach out due to shame or simply not wanting to. They may think it's under control.

If you're having a problem, reach out to someone.

And yes, we will say you're worth it, just like a Covergirl. But we understand your feelings. You don't deserve this, and don't hate yourself.

This last verse is a tough one. It is dark and emotional, but the song, if you remember, is a bop, it's dance-worthy and helps you forget the dark thoughts.

{chorus v2} x 2
Maybe i'm not pretty
Maybe i'm just fun
'cause i got a belly and i got a bum
But i can't be jelly of all the other ones
So i'm falling in love with my
Rum bum bum bum

One of the coolest parts about the song is how this last chorus takes you full circle. It's the same, but the artist, and we, are learning how to love ourselves (and our bums) the way they are.

This emotional, and fun song will bring tears to your eyes as you shake your bum. See what everyone's talking about by checking it out everywhere you can listen to music. Or you can watch the video here.

It makes me happy President Trump wasn't able to ban TikTok.

Rump ump ump um!

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Published on Scary Mommy, & Thought Catalog. Amazon bestselling author. Writer Mom. A bit sassy. Loves words + baby kisses. Reach me at jeweleliese@gmail.com

Medora, ND

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