Looking for love home or abroad? Check this out.

Jessica Ufuoma


Photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash

Looking for love? Many people are. Perhaps you're looking to widen your dating pool by making a move abroad or you're currently abroad and want to figure out if you can be lucky. You know what they say, "don't expect to do things the same way every time and expect a different result". It's time to shake things up and make your love life happen!

Here are some of the ways you can find love abroad (feel free to apply them to home as well. Chances are, they will work!)

1.) Say yes more!

You'll be surprised by the opportunities that open up in your love life when you say yes more. Yes to hanging out with your friends (who knows, your future spouse may show up at that same location), yes to the office hangout or happy hour, yes to that invite you've been dreading. In general, say yes more. When you're actively searching for a significant other, you have to constantly put yourself out there. Staying home and turning down offers will not get you very far.

Tips for doing this abroad

  • Ask the hotel staff or concierge for some events happening in town and go for them.
  • If you're invited for a drink with some friends, say yes.
  • Always use your intuition and inner compass but if there's a harmless invite, say yes to it.

2.) Stay open-minded

Here's the truth - love wouldn't always happen the way we imagine it to. It's important to stay open to opportunities or even for the universe to surprise you. The people you meet may not be your physical preference or have a traditional background as you. When we travel, we meet so many different people who aren't doing the same thing as we do. Maybe you work in Corporate America and expect everyone to have a 9-5 job, whereas in a foreign country, many people are comfortable doing other jobs that are outside what we consider normal. Be accepting and open-minded. Having a closed-mind will narrow your options and can make you lose out on something great.

Things to keep in mind

  • Check your bias often and make sure they are not limiting your chances.
  • Stay open-minded and see where it leads.
  • Don't force things but don't push them away either.

3.) Use online dating apps

In this day and age, online dating has become increasingly popular. Stats show that as of 2020, 32 million Americans were using online dating apps. That's a big number and access to people to choose from. The average person interacts with 3 people per day. Imagine actually interacting with 32 million people every day, that would of course be impossible and also very exhausting but the chances for finding love dramatically increases with the use of dating apps. - that dramatically increases.

Tips for this

  • Make sure to meet at a safe place first.
  • Don't share any personal information until the relationship progresses.
  • Keep your options open until there's someone you meet who's worthy of commitment.

4.) Find new hobbies, or do your existing hobbies more frequently

Let's say you love running but have started to slack off. Now is a good time to pick it back up again or even try a new daily route. If you don't have a hobby, it may be a good time to test the waters and see what you might be interested in. The good thing about finding new hobbies is that it not only gives you something to look forward to, it can also open you up to meeting new people. Being single can also be a lonely place to be but having hobbies can engage you so that you're not waiting around for someone to come rescue you but you're actually in a good place yourself which honestly makes you a more interesting and attractive spouse overall.

5.) If you're finding love abroad, embrace a clean slate

Dating overseas can open up new possibilities, including a clean slate. You have the opportunity of learning from your mistakes and brushing up without worrying about what they may or may not already know about you. You can put your best foot forward and carry on without any biases or prejudices. Make sure to use this opportunity to your advantage. Always be honest but the ball is in your court and you alone gets to decide how best to play it.

Some general thoughts and tips for you

Being desperate is a no-no and people can smell desperation from afar. The best way to approach your dating life both home or abroad is by working on being the best version of yourself, investing in your self and coming at it from a place of fullness, not a place of lack. Realize that anyone will be lucky to have you (and if you don't know this deep down, perhaps you need more work on yourself and that's not a bad thing) and act like it. Continue to stay open and not be boxed in by what you think is the ideal partner. Don't ignore the red flags but don't rule people out just because they weren't what you thought in your head. You can be wrong.

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I write about lifestyle and travel experiences in the United States. I'm also passionate about Diversity and Inclusion and that reflects in some of the pieces I write. My topics range from culture, travel, uplifting marginalized voices and much more. If you're interested in these topics, feel free to hit the subscribe button.


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