"Swipe" Right! How to Make the Most of Online Dating

Jennifer Brown Banks

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We’ve all heard the online dating horror stories:

- bad hook-ups through Craigslist and other online forums

- deception in dating profiles

-Dr. Phil Show confessions

- scams perpetrated against the clueless.

Truth is, online dating can be a beautiful adventure, or an accident waiting to happen.

It all depends on how you approach it. Tread carefully.

HERE ARE TIMELY TIPS FOR OPTIMAL SAFETY AND FAIRY TALE ENDINGS…

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BE CLEAR

Know what you're looking for. Your goals will determine your game plan. Are you seeking marriage? A boy toy? Friendship? Make it known. It saves time for everyone.

BE CLEVER

Never divulge intimate, personal details, your physical locale, financial status, or vulnerabilities through casual exchanges on line. It's always better to be safe than sorry. Practice a little healthy paranoia in the early days. Trust should be earned over time. And with prayer.

BE PROACTIVE

When in doubt, check him out! Do the details of his life and success story seem too good to be true? Is he overly mysterious? Alibis seem more like lies? Be your own P.I. With the advent of the Internet, detective work is easy through an array of online sources and software. Practice due diligence in online dating.

BE SELECTIVE

For obvious reasons, you should probably not choose a cell mate for a soul mate. But, if you do, know that your choices have consequences.

BE REALISTIC

What are your expectations? Are you convinced that you'll find Mr. Right right away? Do you think that all your guys/girls should be a “10” in order to make the cut? You may need to reprogram.

BE PATIENT

True love and compatibility takes time, not to mention some sacrifice.

BE PREPARED

Are you ready for the emotional, spiritual, and psychological work required for dating and mating? Make sure that you're not on the rebound or carrying excess baggage before you engage others in the arena of your life.

And here are a few additional important pointers as you navigate the dating scene...

  • BE A BLESSING, not a burden---Carry your weight in relationships.

One person shouldn’t have to do all the compromising, or all the cooking, or all the cleaning, or all the sacrificing. What value do you bring to the table? Selfishness is a definite turn-off!

  • GET A CLUE!

If you’re having trouble with finding or keeping a mate, consider that you might be the problem. Perhaps you should seek the advice of a trusted female friend for greater insight. Don’t let your pride prevent progress.

  • BE CONFIDENT

In yourself and in the possibility of finding the love and happiness you so richly deserve. The better you feel about yourself, the better the quality of mates you'll attract, and the better your dating experiences will ultimately be.

  • REMEMBER----you reap what you sow. Treat folks the way you want to be treated whether it's online, in love, or as you cultivate friendships.

Final Thought

Keep your options open. Don't date desperately and settle for the first person that shows you potential interest. If at first you don't succeed try, try again!

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Veteran freelance writer, award-winning blogger, thought leader, herbal tea enthusiast. My mission is to entertain, engage and inform readers with articles that are interesting, enriching and diverse.

Chicago, IL
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