"Opinion" Better or for worse

Jennifer Bonn

Jen Bonn

The vows that many of us say to be married are, “I take you to have and to hold, for better or for worse, richer, or poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part. The definition of the word vow is when someone commits to an act, service, or condition. At a wedding, a couple makes these promises in front of family and friends. Many people personalize the vows, but the idea of commitment is still there.

What does better or worse look like? It could mean health or financial success or struggles, fighting personal demons, or sharing joy, but mostly it says that no matter what, I have your back. I don’t know many relationships that are like fairy tales, but complete commitment lets you know that failure is o.k. because at least one person will have a hand extended to help you back up. Let me give you some examples of what it has looked like for us.

Understanding differences

My husband and I are complete opposites, but we understand each other. We also understand why we might respond to things differently. We keep an open mind and listen to each other’s reasons for things.

Being a united front

When you have children, you will learn that they figure out if they can divide and conquer, they can win. Always be on the same page with decisions. Keep communication flowing.

Unconditional love

My husband struggled with some personal demons in a bottle, and for two years, business travel was an excuse to go drink where family would not see it. When family finally intervened, he needed help, not judgment.

I am hyper-sensitive, (not a good quality for a writer), and negative comments wound me, until he says something funny to let me know that I shouldn’t care about what that person said.

We are each other’s guardian of the gate, and warrior of well-being.

I hope you have more better than worse, but realize that even the bad times can bring you closer together.

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I am passionate about running, parenting, education, and self-help information. I enjoy writing articles that will offer readers the information needed to help them in some way. I recently retired from teaching French and Spanish for forty years. I run every day and have done all kinds of races from 5ks to ultra-marathons. I have three children and three grandchildren. I write for several magazines in my area, I am a contributor and in charge of the Pinterest board for a parenting magazine called Screamin Mamas, and I have a second book about to be released through Loving, Healing Press called 101 Tips to Ease Your Burdens.

Kennesaw, GA

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