Deflecting judgment

Jennifer Bonn

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Jen

If you are as sensitive as I am, you probably listen too much to what other people think about you. This type of worrying can be exhausting because we will never please everyone. We also need to realize that someone’s judgment of us not only doesn’t matter, but it also probably isn’t accurate. Don’t waste your energy proving that.

My husband has a great attitude about judgment. He says, “I like myself, and although I know I’m not perfect, I’m o.k. If someone doesn’t like who I am. I’m going to surround myself with the people whom I love and who enjoy being with me.

There have been so many times when I have been upset because someone said something hurtful, and he looks at me and says, “Why do you care?” He then mentions why that person needs to take care of her own issues before she starts throwing stones.

I always try to remember that the people who judge the most usually are struggling with a lot of their own problems. I have always told my children to understand where someone is coming from. Most of the time, kindness and understanding can help someone who is spreading hatefulness, but it can be so hard to do that sometimes. I tell myself I don’t want or need to drop to that level.

The next time you feel the knives of judgment, realize that you can just smile and ignore it because your words and actions will prove who you are, and the hatefulness will catch up to the person doing the judging.

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I am passionate about running, parenting, education, and self-help information. I enjoy writing articles that will offer readers the information needed to help them in some way. I recently retired from teaching French and Spanish for forty years. I run every day and have done all kinds of races from 5ks to ultra-marathons. I have three children and three grandchildren. I write for several magazines in my area, I am a contributor and in charge of the Pinterest board for a parenting magazine called Screamin Mamas, and I have a second book about to be released through Loving, Healing Press called 101 Tips to Ease Your Burdens.

Kennesaw, GA
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