Does anyone remember that rich Australian real estate dude who said that we millennials can’t buy houses because we spend too much money on avocado toast and lattes? Every time I eat avocado toast and drink a latte, I get a real petty satisfaction and think, Screw you, rich Australian real estate dude. Also, by the way, if I went without avocado toast or lattes for a year, do you know how much money I would save? Like, maybe 300 dollars. Not enough for a month of rent, let alone a down payment on a freaking house.
Anyway, that concludes my rant against millionaires (well, for today).
The other day, I went to Sips & Such, a restaurant in Middleburg Heights, Ohio that serves — you guessed it — avocado toast and coffee.
I was tempted to order the chicken and waffles, but because I was trying to be healthier (i.e., lying to myself), I got the avocado toast. Though I’m sure the nutritional aspects of the avocado toast were rendered null by the home fries and the caramel sippucino, which was a frozen blended coffee beverage that contained lots of sugar and milk, my two worst enemies. But I needed caffeine. What was I supposed to do? Order plain black coffee? My sweet tooth won’t allow it (no matter how much my waistline protests).
The avocado toast, of course, pleased my millennial taste-buds. Generous amounts of creamy avocado and cream cheese were spread all over a slice of sourdough bread. And on top of the avocado and cream cheese were cucumber slices covered with subtly spicy chili lime salt. It was delicious and made even more delicious as I thought, Screw you, rich Australian real estate dude, every time I took a bite.
The home fries were also tasty. They were shiny with grease, so they weren’t quite as healthy as the avocado toast. But they were crispy and well-seasoned, and I was tempted to order another side of home fries (I managed to restrain myself. I did lick the bowl clean though and was only mildly embarrassed about doing it in public).
And the caramel sippucino was a great way to get my caffeine fix. Some people might think it’s too sweet, but for me, there’s no such thing as too sweet (much to the chagrin of my dentist and doctor, who are both concerned about my sugar intake). The only negative for me about the drink was the effect it had on my body later (curse my body for being so sensitive to lactose!).
Are you a millennial who unabashedly loves avocado toast? Then you should try the avocado toast at Sips & Such instead of getting a certain chain coffee place’s sad version(#ShotsFired but also, I will retract this statement if the chain coffee place offers me a sponsorship. Just kidding! Well, not really. I’m poor enough to consider compromising my moral integrity a little bit for money. Just kidding! Or am I?).
But in all seriousness, please consider getting your breakfast and caffeine fix from local businesses like Sips & Such. The pandemic has already killed so many great restaurants and businesses. Don’t let COVID-19 kill any more.
Also, if I see an article asking, “Why are millennials killing small businesses?” I will SCREAM. (However, I will proudly admit to killing chains)
If you’re ever in the Cleveland area and looking for great coffee and even better avocado toast, here is Sips & Such’s website. Located at 7535 Pearl Rd, Middleburg Heights, OH 44130