Don't Allow Yourself to be Controlled by These 10 Things

Insaf Ali

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Our lives are influenced by our general outlook on life, experiences, beliefs, and how we choose to see things. And while there are countless paths that lead to a happy and fulfilling life, there are just as many that lead to a life controlled by things that hold you back.

If you want to say goodbye to the things that hold power over you and prevent you from living your best life, the first step is to recognize that which no longer serves you. Then, you can let go of it.

Here are ten things you should never allow your life to be controlled by:

Number 1 — Where You Came From

There’s no doubt, some people have certain benefits or advantages over others. However, where you came from, and the circumstances or situation you were born into should never control where you’re going.

Yes, you might have to work harder, but it is up to you to take whatever you may perceive as a weakness or a detriment and make it work for you.

Number 2 — Limiting Beliefs

Too many people are held back by the chains of their own beliefs. If you possess limiting beliefs, you’ll never discover what you’re capable of.

Most of the time, the voice in your head that tells you “you can’t do it” or “you’re not good enough” isn’t even your own. It was put in your mind by other people such as your parents, teachers, and other authority figures.

Letting go of your limiting beliefs will enable you to make space for motivation and confidence. Know that you can do, be, and have anything. You’re the only one holding yourself back.

Number 3 — What Other People Think

It’s natural for people to wonder and worry about the opinions of others. We like to please and impress, but sometimes we lose ourselves when we spend too much time worrying about how other people see us.

As long as you are happy, healthy, and not hurting anyone, you’re living a good life. And no one’s judgment of you really matters unless you let it.

No matter what you do (or don’t do), there will be both praise and criticism. So, don’t try to please everyone all the time. It’s impossible. Instead, liberate yourself by deciding not to care about what others think.

Number 4 — Fear of Failure

An incredible number of people never really try or accomplish much in their life because they are too afraid of failing. The funny thing is, when you’re so paralyzed with the fear of failure that you never even start, there is zero chance of accomplishment. You fail by default.

When you change how you look at failure, you’ll realize that never starting or giving up are the only ways you can actually fail. Learning looks like falling down and getting back up. That is resilience, not failure.

You have to face obstacles head-on, make mistakes, and continue to push through to the end. Don’t live a life full of regret because you let fear hold you back.

Number 5 — Your Current Situation

Are you waiting for the right moment to turn your life around?

Well, there’s good and bad news.

The bad news?

That moment isn’t coming.

The good news?

You can start right now.

If you’re hoping for a better situation to come along, you’re probably using your current circumstances as an excuse.

Decide to start taking steps in the right direction today, and you won’t regret it. You don’t need the right moment, you need persistence and diligence. Life isn’t easy, and that’s okay. Think about the people you admire and their success.

Did they wait for an easier or better time to do what they wanted to do in life?

Of course not. If they did, they probably wouldn’t have done it at all.

Number 6 — Negative Emotions

Knowing how to manage negative emotions is an essential part of living a happy life. If you let anger, jealousy, or spite consume you, you’ll make decisions that aren’t in your best interest.

When toxic feelings come to the surface, practice expressing them in a healthy way. It’s important that you validate your emotions and learn to recognize what behaviors are and aren’t appropriate for communicating them.

Never let your emotions take hold of you. You’re better than that.

Number 7 — Relationships

In an ideal world, all the people in our lives would value, appreciate, and respect us, and they would treat us with kindness and compassion. But we don’t live in that world.

Anyone in your life (family, partners, friends, colleagues) can be toxic. So, be careful about who you let in, and know when it’s time to cut things off.

Trust is essential for genuine human connection, but it’s not always safe to be vulnerable around others. Acknowledge that your worth is independent of anyone else, and don’t let your relationships hold you back. Surrounding yourself with people who help you grow is a much better experience anyway.

Number 8 — Money

Of course, we all need money to live life. After all, bills won’t pay themselves. But money can hold a lot of power over you. It can influence your decisions by shifting your focus toward material wealth. Chasing money is only satisfying to a certain point.

Once your standard of living is suitable, fancy cars, expensive clothes, and other material things won’t do much for your happiness. That isn’t to say that you should avoid wealth.

Financial abundance can help you reduce stress, achieve things, and help others. The problem is when money starts to control you.

Let your core values guide your life, rather than the chase for money simply for the sake of having more.

Number 9 — Addictions

Addiction is a coping mechanism, but instead of helping you move forward, it holds you back.

When you think of addiction, you might immediately think of drugs, cigarettes, or alcohol. But you can be addicted to many different things like food, gambling, shopping, or even video games.

What’s your vice?

No matter what type of addiction plagues you, they all affect your decision-making skills. Compulsive desires push you deeper into a hole, and the longer it lasts, the harder it is to get out. But recovering from addiction is not impossible.

When you focus on choosing what is best for you rather than what you want, you can discover healthy long-term solutions for meeting your needs.

Number 10 — The Past

We all have at least some distress from things that have happened in our past, and no matter how much we want to change what happened, we can’t.

So there’s no point in letting the past control the present. It’s a waste of time, and it’s a waste of energy. Whatever has happened, you need to learn to let it go. See it as a lesson and move forward.

I know it’s easier said than done. But when you can manage to do it, the weight lifted from your shoulders will be immense.

If you want to really live your life, you can’t let outside forces control you. Accept that you have complete power over your decisions, beliefs, emotions, behavior, and goals.

When you identify which parts of your life come from within and which ones don’t, navigating this complex world becomes more manageable.

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