Opinion: We Live In An Ego-Driven World - And That's OK

Herbie J Pilato

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For the last fifty years, I have studied every major religion in the world. I have read thousands of books about every culture, creed, and spiritual belief.

And what have I discovered?

God comes to us as we believe God to be. If our spiritual definition is Christian or Catholic, then God comes to us through Jesus. If we are of the Jewish faith, then God comes to us through the teachings of Abraham and Moses, and so forth, and so on, and so good.

In each case, Love is the common denominator.

And I always capitalize “Love,” because as far as I can tell, “Love” is “God,” and “God” is “Love.”

But how do we Love and live in an ego-based world?

And let’s face it, we live in an ego-based world, right?

Of course, we do. There’s no escaping that.

And that’s okay — as long as we shed a little light along the way.

Take it from me — someone who for decades has worked in the entertainment industry, which is about as ego-based a career as you can get.

Actors, singers, dancers, writers, and directors are always talking about or promoting their work; in effect, themselves; because more times than not, they are their work; their life is their work.

As a writer, that’s definitely the case with me.

But I try to be very conscious of all that and, in the process, to shine a little light along the way…with my work. I try to incorporate and inject only positive perspectives into my writing, whether it be for a book, a script, or an essay (as I am presenting now).

And yet, too, every career is ego-based; each one of us is ego-based, and we can’t help it. That’s the way things are in what is not only an ego-based world but a broken world that can never be fixed. Certainly, all we have to do is look around us to find evidence of that.

But at our core — and the center of who we are in this world is yep — that Love thing—which, again, is the essence of Heaven. And as long as we utilize Love in conducting ourselves in this world, we should be fine. Because ultimately, we’re all just trying to do the best we can.

We can’t fix this the unfixable in this broken world, because it’s unfixable. But as little individual salves in this world, we can do our best to at least try to fix it…by displaying loving-kindness, compassion, understanding, and forgiveness, especially when we don’t always feel that from others.

The truth is, if we feel that others have disappointed us, more times than not, that’s because we disappointed others first.

But again — that’s okay. We’re all only human. Everyone makes mistakes. Nobody’s perfect.


And never let anyone make you feel like you’re the only one who makes mistakes. Because you’re not.

So, be loving-kind, compassionate, and understanding to yourself, too. That’s just as important as being loving-kind, compassionate, and understanding to others, probably even more so.

[You know, it’s that whole “place the oxygen mask on yourself before you place it on others”-thing.]

Ok — so what does all of this really mean in the big scheme of things? Where do we go from here? How do we proceed?

Once again, it all comes back to Love. It always comes back to Love…because that’s the one thing we can depend on.

You can’t depend on others. They will always let you down. You will sometimes let yourself down. They can’t help it, and neither can you. That’s the point: no one can.

But don’t get bent out of shape about the disappointments. Just be ready for them; realize that everyone is doing the best they can to fix the unfixable broken world; just like you are trying your best to do the same.

Once we all “get” that we’re all just trying to do the best we can, in whatever life or career position or choice that we make; as long as we each employ at the very least and at the very most loving-kindness, compassion, understanding, and forgiveness, well, then this unfixable world becomes a little less broke for having you in it.

Love and God bless us all.

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Herbie J Pilato is the author of several books about pop culture including the newly-published CONNERY, SEAN CONNERY biography, the revised BIONIC BOOK, RETRO ACTIVE TELEVISION, THE 12 BEST SECRETS OF CHRISTMAS, MARY: THE MARY TYLER MOORE STORY, TWITCH UPON A STAR, and more. He's also a TV writer/producer, and has worked for Reelz, Bravo, E!, TLC, and hosted THEN AGAIN WITH HERBIE J PILATO, the hit classic TV talk show (which premiered on Amazon Prime in 2019).

Los Angeles, CA

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