Twin with ‘Questionable Lifestyle’ ruins sister’s life and friendships with irresponsible behavior

Gillian Sisley

*This is a work of non-fiction sourced from social media discussion boards and verified experts/specialists.*

A 20-year-old woman turned to Reddit seeking guidance on a difficult situation involving her identical twin sister's promiscuous lifestyle.

The author shared that while she is uninterested in romantic relationships, her sister, "Emma," is the complete opposite. She explains:

"I have an identical twin sister, Emma. We live together in an apartment while away from home for college. We've always been very similar, not just in appearance, but also in the things we enjoy (as stereotypical with twins I guess) except when it comes to relationships. I'm not interested in relationships at all, not emotional or physical."

Emma, however, is more of a free spirit:

"Emma is the complete opposite. Ever since we started living here, she's been bringing another random guy or girl (or both) home like every other night. It makes me extremely uncomfortable, but since it's her own life, I don't think I really have any right to judge.”

According to Choosing Therapy, when dealing with a sibling who is dabbling in toxic behavior, it’s important to set clear boundaries and communicate your concerns to one’s guardians, but also maintain clear boundaries and prioritize self-care. Additionally, Psychology Today suggests seeking professional help or therapy to navigate the dynamics and support your sibling in addressing the underlying issues contributing to their self-sabotaging behavior.

One major issue is the paper-thin walls in their apartment, which means the author is unable to escape the sounds of her sister's bedroom activities. She continues:

“Problem is that it's really beginning to affect my own life. Not only do I have to listen to her going at it every time, but since we look practically the same and even our names are similar, and I'm getting attention intended for her as well. She has a reputation for how easy she is to get with, and people are approaching me thinking I'm her. My messages on social media are being filled with all kinds of obscene language and crude photos. When I reply saying I'm going to report them, they get confused because of the "good time we had last night".”

The mistaken identity has become so problematic that the woman has lost friends over it:

“Any time I meet someone new, they only seem to be talking to me because they think I'm my sister, and want to have some nighttime fun. As a result, I don't have any friends. I got really fed up with it yesterday and told my sister the way she acts is ruining my life. I told her she either needs to change her lifestyle, somehow make sure whoever she’s intimate with won't bother me, and make it clear to everyone that we're not the same.”

The author continues:

“In response, she told me I need to mind my own business, that I shouldn't be such a prude, and that I could probably use, in her words, "some intimacy" myself. It kind of escalated from there resulting me in calling her a derogatory term.”

What do you think?

Was the author justified to confront her twin sister over her lifestyle and behavior, as it’s starting to negatively impact the author’s life in many ways?

Or does the author need to stop being so judgemental toward her sister, and she herself needs to move out of the apartment she shares with her twin ASAP?

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