18-Year-Old Horrified After Stepmom Tells Her She's 'Lucky' to Be Treated as Equal

Gillian Sisley

Should stepchildren be treated the same as biological children?

There's no one size fits all manual on how to be the best step-parent, and how to successfully blend two different families together as one.

Blended families are becoming more and more common in the US, accounting for about 16% of all households, based on data from the Bureau of Census.

These realities were highlighted in a recent online post in which a stepmother tells her stepdaughter that she's lucky to be treated like an equal child, and the stepdaughter is deeply upset by this comment.

Should stepchildren be treated the same as biological children?

A Reddit post reported on by Samantha Berlin from Newsweek has gone viral with 8,500 upvotes and 1,400 comments.

The author begins her post by explaining that she is the mother of two children, ages two and three, with her current husband. She is also the stepmother of an 18-year-old named Emily who her husband had from a previous marriage.

Emily has been living with the couple for the last 6 months, and she originally moved in because her mom kicked her out. The author indicates that Emily's mom called her 'problematic', and that was the reason they don't have a good relationship.

The author indicates that she's been very welcoming to Emily since she moved in. She and her husband told Emily that she could stay as long as she needed, but the author does admit that her moving in has become a burden to both the children and herself. The example she uses is that their ‘normal morning routine has been altered’ due to Emily moving in.

Is it ever fair to call a child a burden?

The author adds that Emily has become entitled, and that whenever she needs anything financially she'll ask the author or her father for help. While basic necessities like food, clothes, and shoes are covered, Emily is meant to pay for any other things she wants. However, a few weeks ago Emily decided to quit her job.

The author indicates that because of Emily, she's lost ‘most of her savings’, and time has been ‘taken away’ from her children and husband. She adds that Emily is ‘extremely unappreciative’, and suggested to the teen that she find more to do than just take online classes and 'be lazy all day'.

Emily accused the author of being ‘jealous’ of her relationship with her father, and that was when the author reminded her that she was living in her home rent-free. She then told Emily that she should feel ‘lucky’ that the author is treating her as her own, because not everyone would be so accommodating. The author's husband thinks she was too harsh on the 18-year-old, but the author feels that Emily is 18 and needs to 'grow up'.

What do you think? Was the author entirely justified to make the statement that she did, and remind Emily that she's lucky to be treated as an equal child? Or is it completely reasonable that Emily be treated as an equal child by her stepmother, because that's how blended families work?

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