Man Accused of "Ruining" Thanksgiving for Entire Family

Gillian Sisley

His recent choice to remarry is adding a lot of complications to the family dynamic.

With the family politics of Thanksgiving at an all-time high, many are finding it difficult to navigate so many different familial relationships at once.

One man has turned to Reddit to ask if he really is "ruining Thanksgiving" this year for his entire family, which he is being accused of.

The viral Reddit post has received 6,400 upvotes and 900 comments. Readers have a lot to say about this situation, and they're not in full agreement.

Holidays look a lot different since the pandemic.

The man begins his post by explaining that his family, immediate and extended, generally only get together once a year for Thanksgiving. He also explains that he's recently married, and due to the COVID pandemic new his wife hasn't had much of a chance to bond with his family.

Sounds simple enough, right? That's where you're wrong. The man recently found out that his elderly parents have also invited his ex-wife to dinner, which the man is absolutely against.

"My ex has known these people for 20 years and their familiarity and level of comfort will make it hard for my new wife to fit in. My wife insists that I go without her but if she won't go I won't go as my place is by her side."

Dealing with exes on the holidays can make things quite messy.

The man then explained to his parents how he and his new wife would not be attending if his ex-wife was there, as it would make them very uncomfortable. The parents did not take this well.

"My family says that my wife should just suck it up and deal and that if we're not there, we'lll ruin Thanksgiving for everyone."

The man also goes on to clarify that he is one of five children, and four of them have been divorced. He is the only one who is remarried, and also none of his siblings' exes are ever invited to dinner. Just his ex is invited.

He also adds that he and his ex-wife have two children, and they will all be attending the dinner whether or not he and his new wife choose to or not.

What do you do when the lines of family loyalty become blurred?

The man has turned to online readers to ask if he is in the wrong for refusing to attend Thanksgiving dinner with his new wife if his ex-wife is there, and the internet has strong opinions about this.

Readers were very divided on this topic. Most didn't see the man and his new wife as being in the wrong, but they also sympathized with the ex-wife and the children in this situation.

Many users pointed out that, seeing as the man and his ex-wife have two children together, and only got divorced in the last year, it makes sense that the children would want some normalcy of having their parents together during the holidays, especially after the last few years they've experienced with the pandemic.

Some users even went on to say that they had in-laws who had broken up with their siblings, but they were still welcome at family dinners by everyone because they were still considered family. This was especially the case if there were children involved.

Others sided completely with the man, and said that they would be furious if their parents invited their ex-spouse to family dinner when the new spouse would be attending.

What do you think? Is the man in the wrong and "ruining Thanksgiving" if he refuses to attend with his ex-wife there? Or should the family be more considerate of the new wife who is newly being introduced into the family dynamic?

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