Are you that someone whose patience has been teetering between almost empty and empty in the vehicle called life?
Are you the one that doesn’t take much to get riled up, especially when on the road? You know how they say that to know a person, you have to see how they behave as they navigate frustrating traffic?
I sense your engine is starting to roar.
“I never suggest you were a bad driver. I’m sure that mailbox swerved into your lane.”-Enkiquotes.com-
I’m assuming that anyone that has ever been a passenger when you were driving would never be ashamed to acknowledge that they know you. Right? Friends and family far or near, please step up if you can vouch for the driver here.
The police pulled my friend over and asked her, “Do you know how fast you were going ?” My friend replied, “not fast enough because you caught me.” Just for your knowledge, this is not the right answer. My friend looks lovely in jailhouse orange attire.
I’m not assuming that it is your fault some drivers get on your last nerve. I get it.
Here are some of the other less-than-pleasant encounters I’ve experienced. Do you recognize any of these behind the wheel lunatic behaviors?
The one who needs too many breaks
You know that person who takes too many breaks and ends up throwing everyone off schedule because they are clueless as to what they’re doing? Well, those people exist on the road also. The confused and scared kind, or maybe they’re extremely cautious, who knows?
I know that driving behind someone who brakes continuously is enough to make one want to get out of the car and jog instead. I’m sure that’s how I took up a love for marathon running. It’s either that or I drive at a snail’s pace behind someone who hadn’t figured out where they were going when they started on the journey.
The one sending mixed signals
It’s true; mixed signals don’t only exist in the relationship realm. The drivers who turn without using any turn signals give me the same kind of hair-pulling anxiety that they give you. You know the kind of mixed messages that only your mate could provide you. It’s hard to understand if they do this because they’re unsure of their next move, don’t want to commit, or are just trying to lead you on — headfirst into a collision.
The one who can’t stay in their lane
Is there a limit to how many relationship references you can make in a post about driving? Well, here’s another one anyway. Do you know those who try too hard even when you’ve politely asked them to stay in their lane? Who keeps popping into your path every once in a while? Oh sure, you might suddenly be interested?
When I come across a driver who can’t stick to their lane — my annoyance knows no bounds. Some people have too much audacity. These are the ones that think they own the road.
The one who’s plain irresponsible
This one is so infuriating it isn’t even funny. People who text, answer emails, and talk on their phones while driving has been baffling scientists for years. What exactly is so important that they’re willing to put everyone’s lives, including their own, at stake?
There couldn’t be a conversation that required such an urgent response that you’d do the one thing we’d been told time and again not to do. Seriously, texting and driving and responding to emails should lead to an immediate disqualification. Once you’ve got your priorities straight, you can come back. Until then — take the bus.
The other quirks that can get under your gear shift is the lady that insists on putting her makeup on as she is drifting down the road, and just the other day, I saw a man using tweezers to pull hair out of his nose while he managed to steer with his knees. Some folks have all the talent.
The one who has no manners
A responsible citizen takes responsibility and holds themselves accountable for their actions. Do you know that rude driver who relentlessly honks because they’re on the edge of exploding into full-fledged road rage? Is that you?
It’s hard to place blame when you consider the kinds of outrageous behavior one has to put up with to get a Big Mac from McDonald’s, but I admit it can be bothersome. Especially for the people who follow the rules, being smart, and not on a mission to have everyone cursing them under their breath.
And we can’t forget the one that speeds around you and then immediately slows down once they are in front of you.
Also, fast food has a new meaning when dining and driving. Have you ever noticed how cars speed up when indulging in fries? Navigating the burger takes two hands, so he slows down to bite the supersized burger.
Hopefully, you’ve been able to relate to at least one of these incidences. Driving, although it’s a necessity, can be a challenging task. But with the right amount of vodka, patience, and a forgiving spirit, you can learn to make the most out of your experience. It is time to buckled up and put the pedal to the metal.
Somebody complimented you on your driving today. I just saw a yellow note on your windshield that said ‘Parking Fine.’ That was nice.