Hello, gamers! Our choices in video games always indicate who we are. Today, let's talk about what your weapon choices say about you in the Monster Hunter series.
This is the most iconic weapon of the series that hardly anyone uses since it's one of the hardest weapons to actually use. You are a master of the game, capable of predicting the monsters' movements 3 steps in advance. Or people are gonna think you're from Chicago (THE WINDY CITY).
You're the weeaboo wonder who's wildly whipping it out. You're cosplaying as one of those blind sword masters, since you don't see the difference between the monster's tail, where you should be cutting, and the monster's head, where you always seem to be going for. You have two types of moves: moves that might hit one thing and moves that always hit everything, including your teammates. So of course, you're gonna spam those types of moves, to the detriment of your teammates. And you wonder why you're never invited to the cookout.
3. Sword and Shield
You either are a first-time player and you don't realize that you start the game with one of every weapon in your box already. Or you are a long-time player who has gone full circle, tried out every weapon, and realized that the default weapon is one of the best ones. Also, you'll never sheath your weapon, even when it makes more sense to dash.
4. Dual Blades
You are incredibly smart and handsome, and you have excellent taste. Why use one sword when you can use 2 swords, duh? You also need to take a break every five minutes to drink your weapon's life support to make it viable at all known as Mega Dash Juice Beyblade reference. Let it rip!
You like being stepped on… by the monster. You welcome the challenge, only eat for feline provoker, and you would never make the same mistake that Thor made.
6. Hunting Horn
Before Monster Hunter Rise:
You are the cheerleader. You are the backup dancer. You have to constantly pull up the pause menu to look up your songs, only to immediately pause it again, because you forgot which note corresponds to which button. You feel like you did 90% of your contribution at the start of the quest. And when your teammates see you off in the corner do nothing, they'll think, "Oh, they must be using more songs!". But actually, you're pausing the game reading sheet music. You also find it hilarious that one of the biggest weapons is also somehow one of the fastest.
After Monster Hunter Rise:
You saw breakdancing in the trailer, and now you play like you're auditioning for a Dababy video.
You prefer the simpler things in life. You're here to fight monsters, not learn crazy combos. Memorizing overcomplicated pages of tutorials is a waste of time. With the lance, your combos are poke, poke, poke… and run, run, run… poke.
You do not exist (Nobody uses Gunlance)!
9. Switch Axe
You either just started and don't even realize there's a sword mode. Or you watched the Monster Hunter Championships and saw the winning teams were all using the SwAxe.
10. Charge Blade
You enjoy reading PDFs. "Charge Blade Guide"? Let's see here…
11. Insect Glaive
The floor is lava, and you are French. "Je suis monte!"
12. Light Bowgun
You cannot count and will try shooting when you need to reload on every single round… You like the rapid-fire shots, so you can miss three times instead of one.
13. Heavy Bowgun
You are incredibly stubborn and have a short memory, because you will always go into crouching fire right next to the monster and then act absolutely shocked with the monster hitting you.
You like using sleep arrows and putting the monsters to sleep, just for your teammates to immediately wake it up before you're able to place your bombs, because they're playing with the music muted. Or you're always asking people to do a Teostra hunt with you, so you can get the 8% drop needed to upgrade the only other good bow in the game.