There's only one question that matters: Who do you want to be? The answer is yours and yours alone. You can choose to work for someone else, get a degree in something no one cares about, and live a life you don't like. Alternatively, you can take control of your fate and learn how to build something incredible for yourself — whether it's a business or your relationship — from the ground up.
The most important thing you can do to build something worthwhile is to be yourself, first and foremost. This doesn't mean authenticity — that's a different topic entirely. Instead, it means that your ideas for how things should be done come from a deep understanding of who you are and what you want.
You may feel like a lot is riding on this decision, but the truth is, there isn't much at stake. I think it has something to do with Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. Nothing else matters if you don't meet your most basic needs — physical survival, personal safety, social acceptance, etc. As long as you have these covered, you can experiment with what it means to be yourself without much risk of failure.
You may not see it as such, but you do have control over your life and how you live it. Being yourself doesn't mean being ordinary; it means living the life you want to live. Maybe that involves traveling the world, building a business from the ground up, or saving a ton of money for retirement. Perhaps it affects all of those things. The choice is yours to make, and no one else's.
Everyone already has an idea of who they want to be. They know what they want out of life. But they are still missing the ability to become that person. They are following someone else's map, waiting for someone else's dream to come true. And it never will because their dream is too big for them to fit. You have to be a little selfish to create something great. You have to put your dreams ahead of the approval of your peers.
In the end, it doesn't matter how you live your life or who you are. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks about you. It doesn't matter what kind of "job title" you have or how many things you have on your "to-do list." As long as you are genuine, honest, and true to yourself, that is all that matters. Everything else — the money, the stuff, the other people — comes second.
So what if you don't have a degree? So what if you don't have a lot of money saved up? So what if you aren't married? You might be weaker in some areas of your life than others, but that doesn't mean it has to stay that way. Now is your chance to take control of your life and improve things as much as possible without giving up too much.
You are more than just a body with legs, and you are the sum of your experiences and the totality of what you have learned from them. And no matter what comes your way, you still get to decide what to do about it. Shout this one out loud: "I can do whatever I want!"
This is your life — don't let anyone else tell you otherwise. No one knows better than you how to live it. Don't let anyone else decide for you.
People spend so much time finding themselves, but they have it all backward. You are not some nameless, faceless person with no personality or interests. You are not your job or your collection of possessions. You are a unique individual with a distinct set of skills, talents, and opinions that makes you unlike anyone else on the planet. And when you embrace this fact, everything will change for the better.
The rich get richer, and the poor get poorer. Some people win, and some people lose. This is how society works when you have many different people thrown together with no common purpose or goal. But for you, this doesn't have to be the case. You can choose to change things up to win more often than not.
It's not as hard as you might think. The first thing to do is stop playing the game like everyone else. People will judge you no matter what, so you might as well give them something to consider. Don't try to fit in with everyone else — it won't work out in your favor.
The message here is simple: understand who you are, then be that person. The reason people don't have what they want in life is that they don't like themselves. Is this you? I hope not, but it's not too late to change things around if it is.
Before you can build anything great on your terms, you need to know yourself and be comfortable with who you are and where you come from.