3 crazy Thanksgiving-related Florida Man stories to feed your appetite

Evie M.

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Stock photo of a Thanksgiving dinnerPhoto by Jed Owen on Unsplash

Honestly, I can't believe it's already November 21. In just a few days, People will be gathered around tables, stuffing their faces and falling into food comas while watching "Home Alone 2". But Florida Man will still not be resting. I truthfully didn't think Florida Man Thanksgiving-related stories were a thing. I'm not even sure what possessed me to Google "Florida Man Thanksgiving", but I am glad I did because boy did so many amazing stories come up that I had no idea existed. Living in Orlando has opened my eyes, let's just say that. And after hours of reading, I've collected my top three of the craziest Thanksgiving-related Florida Man stories because I'm in the giving spirit. Let's get to it.

1. "Man admits murdering 4 relatives on Thanksgiving, gets life in prison"

There's not even a cute little quip I can make about this outrageous headline. It would be inappropriate. Out of respect for those who are gone, I almost skipped this story entirely, though it was the main choice splashed across Google. But I am a believer in keeping memories alive and saying names so those who need to be held accountable for their terrible actions are and those that paid with their lives are remembered.

In 2011, Palm Beach County Circuit Judge Joseph Marx sentenced a man named Paul Merhige to seven life terms with no right to appeal, telling Merhige: "You’ll never see the light of day."

When I tell you I just cheered. Arrested in 2010 after changing his appearance and license plate in an attempt to give the cops the slip, Mehrige was recognized after someone recognized him off of "America's Most Wanted". Police found him at the Edgewater Lodge under the name "John Baca".

Mehrige confessed to coldly killing his twin sister, a cousin who was only 6, and his 79-year-old aunt after their Thanksgiving dinner. One of his sister's was pregnant.

Mr. Mehrige, I hope Thanksgiving dinner in prison tastes like hot garbage.

2. "Florida man apologized before robbing store on Thanksgiving"

When I read this headline, I wasn't sure what to make of it. It made me both said and say: "wtf?", which is a pretty standard reaction for a Florida Man story. Back in 2015, 27-year-old Brian McCoy from Deltona, Florida was placed in jail after turning himself in for trying to rob a Burger King, and then successfully robbing a Circle K of 12-pack of beer and all of the cash in their register, $87.

According to news sources that received official reports from authorities: "McCoy approached the counter with a 12-pack of beer at the Circle K store and told the clerk: 'I’m sorry to do this on Thanksgiving, but I need all the money in your register.'"

Sad. And all that for less than $100. How desperate does someone have to be to do such a thing? He clearly understood the gravity of what he was doing. Honestly, I just hope Brian is doing better and this Thanksgiving is better.

3. "Florida tradition: Clearwater man tosses Thanksgiving turkey into pool to thaw"

Who knew chlorine was the secret ingredient to a perfect Florida Thanksgiving turkey? L.O.L. This headline genuinely made me laugh when I read it, and the story is just as good. According to this Clearwater, Florida man named Mark O'Donnell who happily demonstrates his strange methods, thawing your Thanksgiving turkey in the pool days before the holiday is the only way it's done in Florida.

Though O'Donnell may have unorthodox turkey prep methods, he stayed cool as a cucumber then entire time he showed off his turkey on Facebook live.

"So yes, folks, we thaw our turkey in the pool. That's how you do it when you live in Florida, right?" O'Donnell said. "It'll get plucked out of the pool tomorrow after thawing out in the water and under the warm Florida sunshine. There's no need to worry about the taste of chlorine; O'Donnell says it's at least double-checked for any potential leaks."

You do you, Mr. O'Donnell. With respect, I think I'll just double up on a lot of sides and skip the bird. I'm not a big turkey fan anyway.

What was your favorite story? Do you have a Thanksgiving story of your own? Let me know in the comments.

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