There are a lot of benefits to having a child-free wedding. Sure, many view weddings as a family event. However, kids at weddings can cause a lot of disruptions. No wonder child-free weddings are gaining in popularity.
No happy couple wants their vows, toasts, and speeches interrupted by crying babies and rowdy toddlers running around. Couples spend hours planning and pay thousands of dollars to make their weddings happen. A wedding is a special and memorable day. The bride and groom feel entitled to a worry-free event.
That often means no kids allowed.
But not all guests love this policy. Some people think it's downright selfish. Or they simply feel their adorable little one is the exception. Even if "child-free" is on the wedding invite, they think their perfect tot should still be allowed to attend.
This is especially true if the parent in question is related to the bride or groom.
This was the experience of a groom-to-be who took to Reddit to complain about his brother, who just didn’t get why he couldn't bring his son to the wedding. The post has since received 36.6k upvotes.
The brother's child is three years old and is, according to the brother, a “miracle baby." That's because he was born after several miscarriages. For this reason, the child should be the exception at this otherwise kids-free affair. The brother even claimed the presence of the boy at the wedding would bring blessings to the groom and his bride.
The groom-to-be still said no. The brother warned that if the toddler couldn't attend, it would create a rift in the family.
The groom-to-be thought there must be a way to get through to his brother. "Child-free" meant no kids allowed. Why didn't he understand?
He finally came up with the idea of flashcards as his solution. On the first card, he placed a sticker that showed a bride and groom. The second card had a sticker of a baby. The third card said "FREE" with a sticker of a 🚫 sign. The fourth card said "PERIOD" with a huge, black dot sticker.
He slowly showed the flashcards to his brother when he stopped by for a visit. Pretty easy to comprehend, right?
One would hope the brother finally got the message. He didn't. The brother now feels completely disrespected.
I have to say that I feel for both parties here. Sure, a couple is entitled to whatever kind of wedding they desire. However, when my dear friend, who is like a sister to me, told me that my two young children couldn’t come to her wedding, I felt quite offended. Hers was a destination wedding. I didn't know how I could attend if my kids couldn't come, too.
She didn't have children and doesn’t plan on having them. She believes my kids are being "rowdy" when they're just being normal kids. I was annoyed, but I didn't argue with her. I found a sitter for the entire weekend and I still went to her wedding.
This is why if you plan to have a child-free wedding, a nice thing to offer an on-site sitter service. An even nicer thing to do is to pay for the service yourself.
Nonetheless, some people still won't be happy. A woman who goes by the user name, “Backpainandwine” tweeted last April: "Probably going to get slated for this, but people are perfectly entitled to request no children at their weddings."
The tweet went viral. A lot of people agreed with her but others were pretty angry about it.
One Twitter user said, "Why vilify children in this way? If you applied the same logic to any other social group you would (quite rightly) be slated too! I’m sure you would never condone: ‘No old people at my wedding,’ ‘no homosexuals,’ ‘no women,’ ‘no fat people,’ or whatever! ‘No kids’ is just as bad."
Another said: "I just find it totally and utterly weird. Weddings are about family and surely that means children. Weddings are about all generations, about renewal, about love."
Others tweeted how child-free weddings are disrespectful and cause major inconveniences for family and friends who are parents.
Another user said they insisted on a child-free wedding, and their best friends didn't come. They've regretted it ever since.
The moral of the story seems to be that while child-free weddings are becoming more popular, if you want to have one, prepare to receive some pushback about it, especially from family. You might resort to methods like using flashcards to try to argue your point, but not every family member is going to understand.
You’ll have your child-free wedding, but you may lose close relations along the way.
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