9 Ways To Make The People You Live With Stop Hating You


If your roommates seem annoyed and you don't know why, start doing these things.

hanging out with friendsImage by author via Canva

Remember when you first moved in together?

It was so new and exciting.

Maybe you got a house with a bunch of friends.

Maybe it was just you and your bestie, or you finally moved in with your partner.

It started out with such promise, but now not so much.

  • Are you feeling tension?
  • Are people avoiding you?
  • Do you feel like everyone's being oddly passive-aggressive?

If this is the case, the problem might be you.

If you've always lived with people who pick up after you (think your parents), you might not understand what it means to be a good housemate.

If you live like a kid, but you're living with adults, this could be what's bugging everybody.

Housework can be a huge source of conflict among people who live together. It ruins friendships and destroys marriages.

So you might want to do a mental audit of what you do around the house.

If your mental audit comes up blank, you've probably got your answer.

Whether you're a roommate or a romantic partner, living with other people requires a certain amount of consideration.

If you want to get back on everybody's good side, try doing some of these because the little things aren't so little when you're living together.

1. Tidy the bedroom (then some other ones).

Stepping over a smelly pile of laundry every time you get in or out of bed might not bother you, but it might bother someone else.

When it's the first thing you see in the morning and the last thing you see at night, that can be pretty depressing, especially if you always pick up your own stuff.

Things like making the bed and picking up your clothes are more important than you think.

I'm also guessing if you do this in the bedroom, you do it everywhere else.

Leaving your plates where you ate or your crap piled up all over the place forces the other people to tidy up after you.

Show you don't expect anyone else to do this by cleaning up after yourself.

It's probably just as easy to throw clothes into a hamper or take your dishes back to the kitchen when you pass by anyway.

kitchen counterImage by author via Canva

2. Wipe the counter.

If you cut something and leave the crumbs on the counter, you're leaving them for someone else to clean.

That's a fact.

There's no kitchen fairy, so the next person to use that area has to wipe it down first.

Wiping up after you make food is not only thoughtful but more sanitary.

3. Clean food out of the sink stopper.

It's gross to use the sink and have the stopper be full of the old food.

It looks disgusting, promotes bacteria, and can stink.

If you're doing anything at the sink, the last thing you do should be to check and clean that little metal filter in the drain.

If you really want to get on everyone's good side, give the strainer and the sink drain a good clean to make the whole kitchen feel cleaner.

clean bathroomImage by author via Canva

4. Clean the bathroom.

The toilet and shower are not self-cleaning.

If they're clean and yet you've never cleaned them, you might want to give it a go.

Bathrooms need regular maintenance for health and safety reasons.

But a dirty bathroom also makes your house feel generally dirty, is off-putting, and gross.

5. Clear the table.

You're not living in a restaurant, so you probably don't have a busser to clear up your dishes or a dishwasher to clean them.

Home-cooked food takes mental energy and physical time to prepare. It's a big job, so you might want to offer to clean up after.

It's an excellent way to say thank you.

6. Do some dishes.

Dishes are one of those perpetual jobs.

Just when you've got them washed and put away, you have to use them again.

The loading and unloading of the dishwasher is a continuous cycle that can get overwhelming and depressing.

When everyone pitches in by washing a few pots in the sink or unloading the dishwasher, it keeps the job from getting overwhelming for anyone.

home cooked foodImage by author via Canva

7. Cook a meal.

Even if you're a terrible cook, there are probably one or two things you do great.

If other people always cook, you might want to try making your signature dish once a week.

Any cook will tell you that a meal they didn't have to cook always tastes fantastic.

Or, you could offer to prep for the person who's cooking. You could chop the vegetables and get out the pots.

Even if you're not that good at it, it's a learned skill, so the more you do it the better you'll get.

Besides, what you lack in skill, you'll be making up in generosity, and that goes a long way.

8. Do the grocery shop.

Grocery shopping is another job that takes a significant amount of time and energy, so offer to make a list and go to the store.

Meals take time to prepare, and grocery shopping can be another hour or more that someone has to tack onto their week.

Combining both jobs is like adding an unpaid part-time job into the mix.

Taking some of the load won't go unnoticed.

If you do more shopping, you might see more of your favorite dishes making it to the table.

fluffy towelsImage by author via Canva

9. Wash and fold towels and bedding.

If your cupboards are full of fluffy clean towels and yet you've never washed or folded one, that's a bad sign.

Your home isn't a hotel.

If you have clean sheets and towels and don't do them yourself, it's not the linen elves.

Grabbing an armful of towels to wash or stripping and washing your bed sheets is a great way to surprise someone with a bit of simple luxury that doesn't cost a thing.

It seems like whenever people live together there's always one person who doesn't pitch in, don't be that person.

If you've noticed some hard feelings from your roomies (or significant other) and you're not sure where they're coming from, you might not be doing your share of the housework.

Get back in their good books by trying some (or all) of these.

Bonus Round: You can also level up your game by changing the toilet paper before there are no squares left to spare.

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Musician, writer, toddler wrangler. Author of "How To Be Wise AF" guided journal available on Amazon as well as "The Automatic Parent" due out in Feb. 2022.


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