I’m sure you see a lot of couples that make it look like they love each other on social media or in public. But when you talk to them and hear their story, it doesn’t seem like they love each other.
Many couples think that what they feel is love. In reality, it's not always the case, they just got used to being together, and there are no more love feelings.
Also, there are situations when you think you love someone, but you don't. You just love the idea of being with someone, the relationship, not your partner.
It's not hard to tell if you are in the last situation. You just have to analyze your relationship and look for the signs that show you love the relation, not your partner.
These are the signs you are not in love with your partner anymore, and you just love the relation:
- 1. You miss him only when you are alone.
For example, you have a busy day, and when you get home you start thinking about him. You start missing him.
The thing is that the missing feeling comes just when you feel alone. So is it really him you are missing? Or you are missing being with a person, and you want attention because you started feeling lonely?
If you love your partner, you will think about him and miss him even in the busiest moments. Don't confuse the need to be around people with love.
- 2. You want to change your partner.
If you love someone, you love their imperfections too.
It's not love when you are always trying to change your partner, make him better.
There is a difference between helping your partner change because he wants to do it and making your boyfriend change because you want to. Forcing your boyfriend to change something about him just because you want to is a toxic behavior.
When your partner sees that you want him to change, the problems will appear. How can he feel loved or wanted when you want him to be different than he already is? Love is when you accept somebody with good and bad.
If you think he has to change more than 50%, you should not be in that relationship. Forcing somebody to change is not the answer.
Most of the time, you are not happy and in love with your boyfriend if you want him to change. You just make him change because it seems easier than breaking up and finding somebody that is perfect for you.
- 3. You don’t live the moment.
When you are with the person you love, you enjoy the moment and don’t think about how the future could be, and it’s not. I don’t mean about the times that you dream about having a family with him in the future. That’s a wonderful thought.
For example, you want to go on a romantic picnic with your boyfriend. You dreamed about how it's going to be and how happy and loved you will feel. When you finally go on that date, you don't feel like you expected to. You don't feel the love, and you just want the date to end.
When you are not with your partner, you start thinking about how could it be when you see each other. But when you are finally together, it is not like in your dream because there is no love.
- 4. Your dates are not making you happy.
Let’s say that in your favorite movie, the characters go on a romantic date on the beach in Maldive and watch the sunset together. You finally have this amazing date that you dreamed about your entire life, and it is not making you happy or feel like you expected it to be.
Everything is planned as you wanted, but you are not happy with how the date goes.
You are not with the right person on your dream date.
- 5. You compare your couple with other couples.
You see a lot of happy and perfect couple every time you open when Facebook or Instagram. Compering doesn't happen just with couples you see on social media. You could compare with a couple from a movie, or even with your best friend’s relationship.
No matter the case, it is a bad thing. The comparison comes when you are not happy and want what others have.
If you are in a love-based relationship, comparison with other couples is never going to happen.
- 6. You think you deserve better.
If you feel this way, it obvious that you don't love him anymore.
You probably heard about a lot of couples that have this problem. One of them doesn't feel like the partner is the right one.
If you ever thought you deserved better, but you continue to stay in the relationship because you love him, you don't love him, you just got used to being with him.
When you love someone, you don’t think you deserve better. You just love him, and he is the right one for you.
- 7. You wish it would be easier.
Being in a relationship should not be exhausting and tiring. Of course, the thing can go wrong and fights happened. This is normal. Every couple encounters difficulties.
It is not normal for you to find it hard to get over a fight, a little argument, and make peace. If you get frustrated and wish things will be easier in your relation, it's probably because you don't love him anymore.
When you love, things are not that hard. When you stop loving him, it gets harder to forgive, even the little mistakes. Everything upsets you, and you just can't make the sad feelings go.
It is hard when you are in a relationship, and there is no love anymore.
Also, it is not easy to tell if there are still love feelings. You could still think you love him, but in reality, you love the relation. You got used to being in a relationship with him.
Breaking up with your partner is hard, especially if you used to love him. You need to analyze and see if you love him. In the end, it may be best to break up, if you or your partner stopped loving the other one.