Want to Find the Perfect Partner? Look at the Weather.

Dawn Bevier

The elements of nature can provide a powerful metaphor for finding the one your heart dreams of


Image by bdcbethebest on Pixabay

Novelist Alice Hoffman said, “When all is said and done, the weather and love are the two elements about which one can never be sure.” And if you’ve played the dating game for any length of time, you can likely attest to this fact. The man whom you expect will be a perfect gentleman soon shows himself as a perfect jerk. You think you’ve finally snagged the woman of your dreams and she quickly turns out to be the stuff of nightmares.

But just as observing subtle changes in the atmosphere can help us predict the weather, if we listen to ourselves and the signals possible romantic others are sending out, we can make more reasonable predictions about the forecast of a relationship. So here’s how to use the truths of nature to be more alert to whether or not that person you’ve been thinking about is going to bring sunny skies to your existence or a torrent downpour.

Thunder: Listen to your intuition

Thunder is the noise that the universe makes when it warns us of a coming storm. It tells us to take shelter and be wary. This is your intuition. You need this awareness when dating because oftentimes it is the only key to knowing when something or someone is not right.

It’s that feeling you get in your gut when you’re with someone and you somehow still feel alone. It’s that rolling in your stomach when you hear your date talk down to a waitress or hear that co-worker you’ve been crushing on mention that he or she just broke up with his or her longtime girlfriend or boyfriend because he or she “let themselves go.” It’s that rumbling shakiness you get in your limbs when you pull out all the stops for a night of dancing or a fancy meal at a restaurant and he or she orders you his or her choice of drink without asking your preference or frowns and asks you why you wore that shirt or that color when it doesn’t look good on you.

Each action a person does and each word a potential partner utters is telling you something about who they are what they believe. And if these echoes you hear in the background seem ominous, that’s your instinct telling you that this is not the type of person who is right for you. There’s a reason why your body and mind are having these reactions, so pay attention to what you feel or think during these moments of unbidden insights.

Lightning: Recognize moments of clarity that show you the truth

One single flash of lightning can illuminate the world as clearly as a ray of sunshine. It reveals things to you that you might have not been able to see in the dark. And in the dating world, the dark can resemble many things. It can be our blindness to the true depths of a person’s soul due to appearance, profession, past actions, or other’s gossip or opinions of the person in question.

Look for those flashes of insight that will inevitably allow you to see the truth about a person’s true colors. And just as you should listen to the menacing warnings that your psyche gives you when you are around a certain person of interest, you should also look for the “light” you feel in an individual’s presence.

For example, maybe you are going on your first real date with someone and he or she takes you to a great Italian restaurant because you made an offhanded comment three weeks ago that you loved risotto. This simple action tells you that he or she was truly listening to even the smallest, most insignificant details of your conversation.

Maybe you see the individual of your office flirtation stop packing up to leave and help out a co-worker desperate to get home and check on a sick child. The sight of such compassion suddenly may suddenly make you feel a warmth inside, a sign that tells you there is more to this person than what is whispered in moments of office gossip.

Maybe you find that his or her laugh or smile is so contagious that you can help but do the same and that the dimples that shine through in these moments are so enchanting you somehow seem to forget about his or her lack of fashion sense or general awkwardness.

When an eligible “other” in your surroundings makes you see beautiful flashes of light in a world that is often colorless and unkind, perhaps you should reevaluate his or her partner potential.

Rain: Notice how he or she reacts in troubled times

Though the thunder of intuition and the lightning of insight can help you better discern if a person may be right for you, there is no more accurate indicator of whether your object of attraction is a perfect fit than the rain.

There will be rainy days for you as an individual and rainy days in each and every relationship, and the way your “other” responds to them may be all that you need to know.

If you have a horrible day at work and call him or her to talk, do they give you quick platitudes and then proceed to ramble on about his or her day, or does he or she truly listen and empathize? If you momentarily lash out in frustration or fear, does he or she immediately get angry or does he or she seek to know what’s wrong? If a bout of anxiety makes you not want to attend the movie or party or night out that the two of you have planned, does he or she grumble and complain or offer to light a few candles, turn on a good movie, and cuddle up on the couch?

I found an amazing quote by an unknown author that explains the beauty you will feel in times of strife if a potential lover is truly invested in your happiness. It states this person can somehow magically “take [your] rainy day and make it glisten with diamonds.”

When this happens, it is a good indicator you may have found “the one.” Because good partners see your sufferings as their sufferings and they are selfless enough to put your needs above their own. They also recognize your flaws and still see the “diamond” beneath them. And not only do they see the diamond, but they make it their purpose to polish its uneven edges and restore you back to your original luster.

The bottom line:

Weather forecasts are uncertain, and there are way more “partly cloudy’s”
than completely sunny weather. And the same is true of the search for our soulmates; we often ironically find that both the sunshine and the clouds can obscure our vision in the same way. The rush of attraction or the prematurely formed first opinions that we make when seeking out true love can often be deceptive when it comes to matters of the heart. But if we listen to our instincts and open our eyes to the signs and signals another is sending our way, we can create a reasonably accurate vision of the future of a relationship.

And though no relationship or person is ever perfect, you’ll know you’ve found the one when the both of you walk through the pouring rain together, sharing the umbrella, and you can each still see the sun breaking its way through the clouds.

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My goal is to provide you with thoughtful, informative, and inspirational content that may increase your productivity, relationships, and well-being.

Sanford, NC

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