There are many reasons people may stop talking to someone. The reasons could vary from lack of respect to a basic lack of similar interest. There are a variety of reasons. For me to cut someone completely out of my life, they have to do something pretty serious. Other than your local troll on other writing platforms, pushing me to that point is challenging.
The odd thing with a Narcissist is the silence doesn’t always last; they can reappear months or even years later as if nothing happened.
It doesn’t matter if it was a multi-year friendship or a long-term intimate relationship. They have no problem cutting the cord for one or all of the following three reasons. So, why do Narcissists cut people out of their lives?
1. You are on to them.
It takes a very aware person and one with solid boundaries to see through a Narcissist. I’ve learned many people keep their distance from specific individuals, and a Narcissist is one of them. Narcissists rarely have very close friends they can confide in when needed. If you develop any close friendships, you will soon discover how drama-filled and draining this type of relationship will become.
Intimate or not, once you begin questioning the Narcissist on their stories, lies, and overall delusion, you just earned yourself a quick trip to the silent tank. There will be no explanation; if there is, be prepared for a barrage of gaslighting and projection, as their ego won’t allow criticism.
2. They found someone else.
This happens when someone else grabs their interest. Someone is showing them a little more attention than you have been lately. Maybe you got busy with school, work, or life and couldn’t give them the round-a-clock attention their fragile ego needs.
They will still want to keep you as a side piece, but you will no longer be their go-to.
But don’t go far because soon enough, the new person begins questioning them, and the Narcissist will be on the hunt again. And they generally seek out familiarity, the ones they don’t have to work too hard on. They know what makes you tick and how to get the attention they crave.
3. You lost your shine.
That’s right, you are no longer fun and exciting anymore. The newness of the relationship has run its course. I know it’s only been two months, and you still feel warm and fuzzy, but a Narcissist doesn’t work that way. Once the honeymoon phase is gone, the Narcissist's eyes begin to wander. It doesn’t take much for someone to spark their interest. You might be surprised by who they replace you with; it can be disgusting.
There are rare occasions they keep you around longer but be sure they are playing the field behind closed doors. Social media and dating apps make it an accessible playground for them. They love it there. They can be anyone they want with little communication to keep their delusion running. It’s their breeding ground.
I know it won’t feel like it, but the best situation you can face is for a Narcissist to quit talking to you. It will save you months or even years of misery. The shorter time you are with them, the better. The mental abuse they dish out can take months to years to sort out.
The critical thing to remember is if a Narcissist stops speaking to you, they did you a favor.
And if you are fortunate, they will stay gone, but that’s rarely the case.
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