Opinion: Motherhood can be a choice, an obligation, or both. The good news is that there are many ways to have children or be a mother in the modern world. Frankly, being a mother is more than giving birth to a child. Adoption or foster mothering provides a place to choose a child and support the common good.
First, mothers run the world. Well done, all mothers out there.
In the US, many women can choose motherhood or being child-free. After all, we live in the land of the free, the United States of America.
Also, think of the world as a personal car. Without gas in our vehicle, it stops. So, likewise, the world will stop without women giving birth or when we have a soon-to-be AI womb.
Women can take motherhood as a responsibility to replenish the world as the aging population grows faster than the younger ones.
Getting pregnant and having children may be an obligation because we have to contribute to our existence and progress as a member of society.
For example, many people do not like hefty income taxes but pay them anyway. Some people hate going to fight endless wars, but they do. Many detest stop signs but still stop to prevent accidents.
Having a child is expensive.
So true. Caring for a child today can cost over $240,000 before they turn eighteen with the latest smartphone, fancy toys, and cutthroat schools.
As an adult, feel free to do what works for yourself and the common good. Sometimes, many individuals do things they don't want to do because of an obligation or responsibility.
That said motherhood is a choice. Let's see four ways to become a mother.
I. Get pregnant, and give birth to a child after about 40 weeks.
As an adult with various resources, getting pregnant on your own may be easy and less expensive for people without complications of low sperm or uterus. In addition, in vitro fertilization (IVF) can be the answer for many women and men with infertility problems. However, without good health insurance, IVF can cost an arm and a leg. More importantly, the emotional toll of IVF treatment can be enormous. Do your research.
II. Hire a surrogate mother.
If you are an adult and want to be a mother with available resources for a child, hire another woman to birth your baby. No guilt or shame; hire someone to have your child. If you cannot hold a baby, hire someone to do it for you; many young women in your town or city can help. Again, find ways to decrease guilt or explanation. That is right; you are not selfish but do what works for you and your family.
There are different arrangements in different states for surrogate mothers. Ensure you read the law and hire an attorney to review all the papers. A few decades ago, we did not have all the conveniences we have today, but here we are, use it or lose it.
III. Adoption
The best part of adoption is a parent gets to choose their baby. What could be better than that? Call your local family and children services today to schedule a meeting with the adoption coordinator. Start early; adoption can take more time and effort.
Many children in our county's social services department seek a mom and dad. If you enjoy children, call your local adoption center to begin adopting a child. Children from one day to seventeen are available for adoption.
IV. Foster parenting makes sense
Do you like children? Be honest. You must enjoy children before you can foster them.
Do you know you can adopt your foster child if the birth parents refuse to show up for a certain period? Every child needs a permanent home, and that is always the goal. Choose your foster child if you like children and are ready to be a mother or father. Children from one day to seventeen are looking for a foster parent.
Call your county children's services to learn how to test motherhood by becoming a foster parent.
Happy Mother's Day.
References
https://ocfs.ny.gov/programs/fostercare/
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/In_vitro_fertilisation
https://ocfs.ny.gov/programs/adoption/about.php
https://www.usda.gov/media/blog/2017/01/13/cost-raising-child
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