Guy tells girlfriend he wants a prenup when they decide to marry; she says then just do it now or "don't waste my time"

Amarie M.

One guy suggested to his girlfriend that they do a prenup when the time comes for them to get married because by then he will be making significantly more money. But he didn't expect the response that he got from her. He has taken to a Reddit post (that has since been deleted) to explain the situation.

**This article is based on information sourced from social media and psychology websites, cited within the story**

There's something to be said for being careful of what you ask for, which is an ideal that one guy has found out. He explains how telling his girlfriend he wants a prenup in the future turned out for him.

In his post, he says that he is 30 years old and his girlfriend is 29, and they have been together for four months. He explains what happened, stating:

I brought up a prenup to her. It’s a very serious relationship for us but she says won’t pay more than half on rent or anything else when we move in together in a few months when our leases expire.
She makes double what I do now and it being six figures she can afford to. I am a resident so I don’t make much now but I will in the future. So I feel like she is doing the logical thing by protecting herself and so I need to as well.

Evidently, he didn't expect his girlfriend to get upset but she did. He goes on to explain what happened when he told her, stating:

She was upset when I told her the reason I wanted to do a prenup is because she won’t pay more than half the rent. She went home and didn’t talk to me for a while. Then I contacted her and we had a chat. She said she wants me to write up a prenup and for us and our lawyers to negotiate it out and presign it for when we get married.

He did not expect her to say go ahead and do a prenup now, as he feels it is too soon. But maybe it isn't. An article on suggests it's best not to deal with the details of a prenup too close to the wedding date, to lessen any angst or stress associated with it. On the flip side, a Fellow of the American Psychiatric Association from Psychology Today suggests that prenups can wreck romance and negatively affect relationships.

The poster continues:

I’m shocked because it’s so early into the relationship to be ironing out the details of the prenup but she insists I’m wasting her time otherwise. She won’t let me visit her on her birthday and didn’t want a gift and just told me to focus on the prenup. She said things like “don’t waste my time” and “until we have agreed to the prenup our relationship is on hold”.

He ends his post by saying that he feels like his girlfriend might be the one, but putting prenup details together so early on seems like a bad idea to him. He says that she's acting strangely about it and refuses to do it at a later time. He then poses a question regarding whether he was wrong.


What are your thoughts?


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Relationship coach and social media enthusiast

Louisville, KY

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