Every year, for the past ten years, two best friends have gone away to spend a "phone-free" weekend together. However, since one of the friends had gotten married, his wife insisted that her husband bring his phone with him. But after repeated non-emergency calls and texts, he shut off his phone for the remainder of the getaway. Recently, he reached out to the public on Reddit to explain what happened.
**This article is based on material obtained from sources pertaining to social media, university and psychology websites, which is referenced within the narrative**
Transition is an inevitable part of life, whether it be in relationships, employment, or the passing of seasons. Change can bring about feelings of unease and anxiety as we anticipate what lies ahead. And then there are unique customs, habits, or traditions which, according to Dr. Helen M. Farrell, a psychiatrist with Harvard Medical School, can serve as an unwavering anchor in our rapidly changing world as they assure us that some aspects of our lives can predictably remain the same.
And for the past ten years, two close friends have held to a yearly ritual of unplugging from everyday life to spend an entire weekend together. One of those friends, the author of the post, provided some insight into their time-honored tradition:
My best friend (31m) and I (27m) have a tradition of taking a yearly weekend trip together that's phone-free. We've been doing this for a decade now. These weekend trips consist of us staying in a suite and exploring the city, not traversing the wilderness so it's not like we're completely disconnected. Still, we liked to keep one on hand for navigation and emergency purposes, and it would usually be Friend's phone that we brought along.
Recently, they embarked on their annual weekend tradition, and for the author, it was the first time that he went on one of these excursions since he got married. Evidently, his wife was well aware of these trips since he had already gone on them twice before getting hitched. And according to her husband, she didn't have any issues with those particular getaways.
I would just tell her I was going to be busy for the weekend and she'd leave me alone.
This time, however, something inside her changed dramatically. He continued by saying that he was aware of the shift in expectations after marriage but had no idea she would experience such a drastic change. In essence, his wife insisted that he bring along his phone on the supposedly "phone-free" weekend.
I let her know I had arrived and immediately after that she was texting me and asking me how things were. Then again, asking me another question when I didn't respond to the first one. I eventually muted our text conversation because I was sick of the phone buzzing.
Nevertheless, the wife stayed determined and phoned her husband a few hours later, inquiring why he hadn't replied to her text messages. Once more, he reminded her that this was his "no-phone" weekend getaway.
The University of Colorado Boulder emphasizes the importance of developing healthy relationships outside our romantic ones to have a robust support system. In fulfilling partnerships, significant others trust each other implicitly. This confidence permits both people to nurture their connections with friends and family separately from one another.
So perhaps we can infer that there may be issues with trust because, following their conversation, she phoned him again. Upon discovering it was a non-emergency situation, he powered down his phone.
In his own words:
The calls then started coming in for my friend and he followed suit. We spent the rest of the weekend with our phones off until the drive back on Monday.
As the two friends were nearly home, about a half-hour away from their destination, he gave her a ring. When she picked up, she was clearly agitated. As it happens, her sister had been in a car accident that left a few broken bones, but thankfully no further harm was done that resulted in anything long-term.
She accused him of ignoring her when she "needed" him. He explained:
I told her that I was very sorry to hear about her sister, but it wasn't my fault she had essentially forced my hand into cutting off means of communication.
That evening, she stayed at a friend's house. But she's since returned home and is still holding a grudge against him.
What do you think?
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Thanks for reading,
Farrell, Helen M. M.D."Happiness and Tradition." Psychology Today
u/Remarkable-Use-8439. "AITA for missing an actual emergency because I turned off my phone to avoid my wife's unnecessary contact attempts during my tech-free weekend?" Reddit
"5 essentials for a healthy relationship." University of Colorado Boulder
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